Title: You Go!

Soundcloud Time: 57:37
Youtube Time: 57:46

Original Record Date: February 17, 2014
Soundcloud Publication Date: March 7, 2014
Youtube Publication Date: March 23, 2016

Please Welcome a Man
Who when he’s orgasming when having sex with a fan, shouts “Moon on a stick!”

Cool Kids
N/A

Guest Best Known
From appearing in the film In the House with Cleopatra & Friends, which I believe starred the pop group Cleopatra.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: Better
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
Kerry English teacher
has never had sex with a pupil
references Peter Baynam telling RH that he was delighted his grandfather was dead
has never seen a bigfoot
Ellie sitting with Kerry
works for Citizens’ Advice Bureau
doesn’t give advice
project coordinator for a lottery project
bridesmaid at Kerry’s wedding
Unnamed works in an arts and crafts supply shop
Unnamed wearing a t-shirt with a picture of a shopping cart orbiting a lemon
revealed to be a U2 t-shirt
Butlers still buttling at the same place
has never seen a bigfoot
David Frew nuclear physicist
references rain power

Emergency Questions

Would you rather have a tit that dispensed talcum powder or a finger that can travel through time?

Oh I like that idea. The non-chafing tit? Fountain of talc, great. I’ll take talcum tit. Total talcum tit. I drive a lot on Virgin trains that stink. Talcum tit would be so useful. No, it’s the best invention ever. Your other guest that you had on, he was talking about the puff ball and you didn’t know what one was. But you’re a country boy?

Have you ever seen a bigfoot?

No.

How many chemicals are there in a carrot?

There’s a lot of water. It would be some thing like 98% water. And then there’s some – are you talking vitamins? Is it Cr12?

If you were going to go on Dragon’s Den, what would you pitch on Dragon’s Den?

I should have thought about this, shouldn’t I? I did once have an idea and now I can’t remember what it is, which is a shame. I think that question’s too hard to spring on people. Because if you had a really good idea you’d take it to Dragon’s Den, not give it away on this stupid podcast for all your nerdy mates to listen in and think, Oh, well I’ll take that to Dragon’s Den. I’m going to take talcum tit in.

Ben Evans: Jonathan Wright: Would you rather be a cow or a badger and why?

Cows make good rugs. I have a cow hide at home, a nice big cow hide. Badger’s only make tooth brushes, don’t they? Shaving brushes. I remember when I had a brace and part of the, sort of, getting over the brace was being bought a badger bristle toothbrush. This was in the 70’s. You were taken on a badger hunt and you had to catch your own badger, forge your own brush. No, I don’t know the answer to that one either. Badgers – people are killing them, aren’t they? I think I’d rather be a cow. I’ve never seen a live badger. You see them squashed on the road all the time, don’t you? I don’t think there’s such a thing as a live badger.

Notes

RH wearing “Have you ever seen a bigfoot?” t-shirt.

RH’s birthday is July 12th.

JE is not in Dirty Britcom Confessions.

RH talks about his history of theft, including stealing every single Tintin book in two separate sessions.