Title: Air Mattress

Soundcloud Time: 1:10:09
Youtube Time: 1:10:16

Original Record Date: June 12, 2017
Soundcloud Publication Date: June 28, 2017
Youtube Publication Date: June 28, 2017

Please Welcome a Man
Who has spent this afternoon clearing up some cat wee.

Cool Kids
I was down at the Saturday Superstore, hanging around with Mike Read. Not that one, the other one. The one who’s still alive – the racist one. The Calypso one.

Guest Best Known
As the floor runner on Mischief Night.


Better or Worse than Last Week: N/A
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
David Frew RH asks him if he can smell cat wee, since RH spent the day cleaning up after his cat

Emergency Questions

Where do you stand on transubstantiation?

Transubstantiation? […] Um, my stance on transubstantiation, Richard, is a Protestant stance. I went to a Methodist school. Yeah, so it’s all very metaphorical for me.

What is the worst Adam Sandler film, in your opinion?

I don’t really… I’m just going to say any Adam Sandler film that pops into my head. Is it an Adam Sandler film – The Waterboy?

Have you ever been brainwashed?

Aw, that was such a good question. Maybe. I don’t know, do I? I’m trying to think if I ever came close. I’m too scared to go into that room. I think I could be very easily brainwashed.

If you had to do a human centipede with two other people, if you had to, but you could choose the two other people, and you’re in the middle, who would you choose?

Do I have to? Um, so, with a human centipede is someone – I haven’t seen it – so someone’s up your bum? *RH explains mechanics of human centipede.* I’m not joking, that has just broken my dream. And it was – oh my God, this is so weird – I had a dream last night that Sacha Baron Cohen was making me eat shit. I didn’t mind because it was Sacha Baron Cohen. So him. No, I can’t; don’t make me answer the rest. I feel like I’ve already said too much.

Have you ever seen anything truly unexpected in a bagging area?

I mean, I can’t top the question, that’s the problem.

Is it just me, or is the aftertaste to a Pringles crisp just a little bit claggy?

You know, Pringles aren’t actually crisps. No, technically. They can’t be called crisps anymore because they’re just Pringles. ‘Cause it’s not a crisp because it’s not got enough potato in them. I don’t mind them. Did you see Jermey Corbyn eating the Pringles? Because he’ll just do anything. He’s just a lad. Someone said, “Hey Jeremy, have some Pringles.” And he went, “Alright.” I’m definitely voting for you, Pringle-eating legend.


JK is pregnant at the time of recording.

RH asks if JK had a preference for sandwiches or tampons, which JK interpreted as an emergency question. RH noted that he would later ask this of next guest Adam Buxton.

RH notes that the first edition of the emergency question book is selling so well Go Faster Stripe may do another printing run.