Title: Jimmy Tarbuck’s Bad Day

Soundcloud Time: 1:26:34
Youtube Time: 1:27:10

Original Record Date: Unknown
Soundcloud Publication Date: May 23, 2018
Youtube Publication Date: May 23, 2018

Please Welcome a Man
Who is removing the clothes pegs from his penis and testicles right now.

Cool Kids
I was hanging out with the Wolf of Wallstreet the other day. The guy the film was based on. I was eating some cocaines off a prostitute’s bottom. I found the whole experience quite unhygienic, if I’m honest.

Guest Best Known
For his appearance on Dick & Dom in da Bungalow.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: N/A
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
N/A N/A

Emergency Questions

If you had to be anally violated by a popular chocolate bar, if you had to, which chocolate bar would you choose to be inserted in your anus?

Topic. One has a hazelnut in every bite. Topic. Short. It’s chunky, but short, so you get it over with. You wouldn’t want a full – you wouldn’t want a Marathon duo.

What is the worst music that you’ve had on whilst having sex?

*RH notes that he once had Enya playing.* So did I. *Raises eyebrows.* That’s who you are! I knew I knew your face from somewhere. Um, that’s uh – Oh, yeah, the Christians – do you remember them? Yeah, I had an extremely unsatisfying, short encounter at university with a very drunk – lovely – drunk lady. Put the Christians on. *AM sings a piece of their music.* And I think I got halfway through the first number on the cassette. Didn’t get to hear any of the deep cuts on the B side.

Would you rather be able to stop time and rewind your life twenty seconds, but only once per day, or touch God’s cock?

B. Touch God’s cock. Then I’m the bloke who touched God’s cock. That’s like you set up a Church of the Touch Cock of God, register for charity, because churches are charities, fucking bazinga! *RH asks if AM isn’t worried that seeing God’s cock lead to a situation like in Raiders of the Lost Ark.* It’s worth a punt.

Is sex with a Frankenstein cheating?

A Frankenstein’s monster? Uh, the whole body of just the skeleton? Yeah, it would be cheating, but it would be, it would be like level 2. Well it depends whether you then switch the Frankenstein back off again. *RH posits scenario where part of the Frankenstein was AM’s partner.* Well, it’s definitely not cheating. In fact, it’s the most honourable thing a man can do. *RH posits scenario where AM has sex with the organ recipient after his partner has donated the organ.* Well, you’re donating an organ in the process. Yeah, I mean, the thing is, some of these moral dilemmas, with all due respect – well, there’s not a select committee, thrashing these out right now, is there?

Notes

When discussing the chocloate bar emergency question, RH notes that George the sound guy chose a Toblerone.

AM is brought another glass of wine onstage.

This is AM’s this second appearance.