Title: Gurt Lush

acast Time: 53:42
Youtube Time: 55:26

Original Record Date: Unknown
acast Publication Date: April 16, 2019
Youtube Publication Date: April 17, 2019

Please Welcome a Man
Who has just signed a billion dollar deal to make his badger-based Aardman show. It’s going really well.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Licking Sherpa Tenzing Podcast

Cool Kids
I was at the Herschel Museum of Astronomy in Bath just before this show. You know Uranus was discovered in Bath – did you know that? […] I was hanging out with some of the guys from the William Herschel Society.

Guest Best Known
As the Party Girl in Peacock Season, the Richard Herring vehicle that you may be aware of.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: Better
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
Susan KH’s friend
confirmed date of KH’s ventriloquism audition with the BBC
Unnamed after confirming that Peter Gabriel lived in Bath, RH asked him if he was Peter Gabriel
RH claimed that guest looked more like Charles Manson than Peter Gabriel
Francesca Beauman KH’s friend
author of The Pineapple: King of Fruits
Unnamed father is a retired PE teacher at Maidenhead
confirmed that his father never raped anyone

Emergency Questions

What is the strangest place that a cat has licked you?

What? Repeat. Oh, I don’t like cats. *Audience member cheers.* My dad used to say – oh, thank you, it’s not really good – my dad used to throw potatoes at cats, when they got in the garden ’cause they’re – no, that’s not “hooray”! Don’t hurt cats. So I had this innate hatred, but I don’t understand why. But it’s because of the potato throwing. I should have kept that in. Always, always, always, always have a bag of potatoes in case the cats come around your garden. Always.

What was the weirdest reason you ever skived off school?

Yes, loads, loads. Like when I was at six form, but this is because I really loved my mum and I really loved lunch. And I used to just run back home and just go sit. Have my lunch with my mum and watch Late Lunch. And not go around the bike sheds and have a doobie and be cool. No, no, no, run home to be with my mum for three hours and watch Late Lunch. And talk about what we’re going to have for tea, whilst we’re eating our lunch. And I still do that with my mum. I live with my mum.

What is the unhappiest animal you’ve ever seen in a zoo?

Ooh – all of them, mate. They’re in a zoo. They’re in a prison, basically, aren’t they? Okay, probably… […] I mean, I saw a penguin recently and he was just swimming into the glass and that’s, like, you know, *makes head-banging motion* “Kill me. Kill me. Kill me.” So I did.

What was the worst thing a teacher ever said or did to you at school? And was it a games teacher?

Probably the worst thing a teacher ever said to me, actually, the worst thing… I was – how old was I? Sixteen, six form. And the drama teacher was driving me home – that’s normal, right? And he was giving me an analysis, sort of a character analysis of me as a person. And he was like, “The trouble with you, Kerry, is that you’re all silly, aren’t you? You’re all silly. You could never be sexy.” Which I was just like, *pulls affected face and makes disjointed noises*. Run out the car.

Notes

Recorded at the Bath Komedia.

KH performs dolphin/monkey impression.

RH refers to the Leicester Square Theatre podcast as the “proper” podcast.