Title: Exiting Stourbridge Multi-storey Car Park

acast Time: 1:23:24
Youtube Time: 1:24:16

Original Record Date: Unknown
acast Publication Date: June 25, 2019
Youtube Publication Date: June 26, 2019

Please Welcome a Man
Who’s wearing the same jumper he’s wearing in the poster for this tour.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Lifting Soggy Tarpaulins Podcast

Cool Kids
I was hanging out at Mr Egg the other day. Just, like, having a bit of an egg. Late-night hankering for an egg. The original Mr Egg was there – not the new one. The original Mr Egg; the good, the proper one.

Guest Best Known
As the sex party host in Sex Lives of the Potato Men.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: N/A
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
Unnamed Cheered Stourbridge’s Corbett Hospital when mentioned by AC.
Unnamed Cheered loudly after RH asked the ghost emergency question.
Unnamed Loudly asks “Why?” when AC chooses the sun cream-dispensing armpit over the ham hand.

Emergency Questions

Have you ever seen a ghost?

Um, I… no, I don’t – I don’t know; sometimes I get funny feelings in the middle of the night. *RH makes joke with sexual connotation.*  I’ve only ever had one wet dream. And I remember it. I remember it precisely. I remember where it was. It was my mum’s house in Croatia. And I was about – I know I wasn’t driving. I wasn’t able to drive at the time. Because the dream, the dream involved – But I was in bed with my brother, three years younger than me. I didn’t ejaculate all over him. But I – the dream was I was in Croatia on this island and I had a dream that I was driving my mum’s light blue Ford Cavalier out of the multi-storey car park in Stourbridge. And every time, because you’re going down a ramp then around a bit, then another ramp. And every time I went down a ramp *makes noise of pleasure* and then around and then *makes noise of pleasure*. And then finally when I came out into the open air onto the Stourbridge Ring Road I ejaculated.

If you could have a hand made of ham or an armpit that dispensed sun cream, which would you prefer?

Sun cream, definitely. Yeah. Yeah, but I’m vegetarian anyway. *RH advises that it’s not ham from a pig.* It’s animal matter. *RH pushes back further.* You can’t question me. You asked me a straight question, I told you a straight answer. I just want the… I’d have factor 20 out of one arm and factor 50 out of the other. *RH advises that there can be only one sun cream-dispensing armpit.* Alright, I’ll go for factor 50. I was talking to some dermatologist and they said no sun tan is healthy. Skin cells are dying. Anyway, that’s your public health announcement.

Have you ever seen a bigfoot?

Uh, not that I recall.

If you had a finger that could travel through time…

*AC, to interpreter for the hearing impaired:* I can’t believe you’ve had to sign all this. What does she do for “ejaculation”? The worst day I’ve ever had, following the Albion, was the play-off final of the – the play-off final of, would have been 2007, I think – where we lost to Derby County 1-nil, at Wembley. *Audience member cheers.* Oh, shut up. Did Giles Barnes score that goal? Can you remember? Were you there? Anyway, I’m pretty sure Giles Barnes scored the goal. Now, as we went on that run towards the goal, I would run alongside him, as fast as I could. I’d have to train because he’s quick, Giles Barnes. And at the moment he pulled the trigger to shoot, I would have inserted my index finger into his bottom. And if he still scored in those conditions, then fair play.

Notes

Recorded at the Birmingham Town Hall.

Includes video of interpreters for the hearing impaired.

RH notes that there are 1,100 people in the audience, making this the largest audience to attend one of RH’s shows.

Part-way through the show the house lights are raised at AC’s request so he can take a picture of the audience.