Title: Mr Adjective

acast Time: 1:01:09
Youtube Time: N/A

Original Record Date: August 7, 2019
acast Publication Date: August 7, 2019
Youtube Publication Date: N/A

Please Welcome a Man
Who has just had another opportunity to assassinate another major political figure. Let’s find out if he did it.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Lighting Scottish Tartan Podcast

Cool Kids
I was hanging out with Nica Burns and all the people who worked at the Edinburgh Fringe in the 80’s and 90’s for nothing and have managed to get brilliant jobs in theatre and the media and expect people today to do the same today without realizing that there are literally a hundred times more people up here and fewer jobs.

Guest Best Known
JA: For being the make-up artist on Hunka Wunda. That’s why we’re here today. And she was also the still photographer on that as well. You may not know that; that’s something she keeps secret. She’s a woman of many talents.
DO: For his hit song Orange, which made number 30 in the Irish charts.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: Better
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
Liam present
RH notes that after his death he might bequeath his penis to Liam (or the Icelandic Phallological Museum)
gave Catherine Wilkins a bag of Crunchy Nuggets for her to eat in front of RH
JA’s mother present
JA tries to involve her reluctant mother in the conversation

Emergency Questions

Jayde Adams

What’s the most unusual thing you’ve ever rented?

What is the most unusual thing I’ve ever rented? I mean, I’ve had some pretty questionable Airbnb’s. I’ve had an Airbnb when I, um, I had to lift the mattress for some – I had lost something and I looked everywhere in the room, and I lift the mattress and it had a huge bloodstain. It was massive, right across. And that was, that was pretty bad. I still gave them a good review though. I don’t really rate people badly on anything. The only people I did was when I was forced – forced – into reviewing a potato masher I bought off Amazon, that I haven’t even used yet. And I got a message every day about reviewing this potato masher. I got so mad I went onto Twitter and I got angry at them. And then I started getting bullied by James Acaster and Ed Gamble. And then they started up this hashtag called #jaydebangamash, which is related to another one about Phil banga wanga mash or whatever it is. And then I started getting picked on by them all. And then I turn up to a gig where I’m doing [unclear] where you play computer games in front of an audience. Ed Gamble’s opposite me, and then during the match he takes his top off – he’s got a t-shirt that says #jaydebangamash on it. They were trying to force me into reviewing the potato masher. And I’ll be honest with you, I’ll tell you about this potato masher. It was a fold-away potato masher. You couldn’t mash anything with it because it folded itself away every time you did. *RH notes that he wants a tool that gets the lumps completely out of his mashed potatoes.* A ricer. There you go. A potato ricer. You, um, you basically mash it up a bit then you feed it through the ricer and it makes the – that’s what chefs do. I’ve been to posh restaurants.

If you could have a hand made of ham or an armpit that dispensed sun cream, which would you prefer?

I’m a bit funny about cannibalism. Call me old-fashioned, but I’m not into it at all. Like, if it’s ever on a movie or something I get, like, it makes me feel really weird. Like, I get a weird feeling about it. *RH questions whether it is cannibalism.* If it wasn’t ham, if it was, like, pork crackling that came out, and it was slightly warm and it had apple sauce on it. If that kept growing out of my hand, then you would have me, but the ham thing would bother me. *RH notes that you could do that with your hand.* What, just cover it in pork? We’ve got a similar taste to pigs, I’ve read. I feel that if I responded to this it would be an irresponsible use of my platform, Rich. What was the other question? *RH reminds JA about the sun cream armpit.* See, I’m fair – that’s great. And no one ever believes me, but I’ve got things growing out – I don’t shave – my parents hate this – but I have hairy armpits, so growing things out of my armpits don’t bother me. So actually, what would be more useful is to have sun cream because sometimes I go outside. Only if it Neal’s Yard though. If it was constant Neal’s Yard sun cream I’d be well up for that.

David O’Doherty

N/A

Notes

Audio only.

Recorded at the New Town Theatre.

At the end of the interview RH collects donations for Scope.

RH notes that he once had a job picking mushrooms, which he says he did badly.

DO noted that in an effort to have his oven fixed, a man named Dave Manners agreed to do it if DO appeared on RHLSTP.