Title: Woody Allen Lift Horror

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Youtube Time: 1:04:09

Original Record Date: Unknown
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Please Welcome a Man
Who you haven’t just seen. This is the first time you’ve seen him, remember. Who has just owned Piers Morgan, according to The Poke website.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Limbo Shall Transpire Podcast

Cool Kids
I was hanging around in Byker Grove – I mean it had to be, didn’t it? – the other day. And Spuggy was there. Spuggy was there. She’s now – she’s a middle-aged woman with four children. One of them who was, ironically, blinded by a paintball gun. You’d think she’d – of all the people you’d think she’d have learned. Anyway, Spuggy and three of her kids…

Guest Best Known
For playing ‘Cheesy’ Alan Supple in Time Gentlemen Please.

Audience

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Member Member Note
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Emergency Questions

Who’s the most surprising famous person you’ve been in a lift with? And which I mean, you can’t have gotten into the lift with them; they had to be in the lift you were in.

Woody Allen. What it was was I was standing, basically – this is the whole story, right? And I don’t know whether this – but this happened. I was in the toilets at the hotel in Cannes in the main hotel. And I was in the hotel and I was a bit pissed. And Woody Allen came into the toilet. And I went, and I thought, I remember about Steven Spielberg. I thought, Don’t fucking talk to him, right? So I just went into the cubicle. And I don’t know whether it was him, but somebody went into the cubicle next door, and I heard them going, *makes grunting noise.* So when I got in the lift I didn’t say anything and I was going up in the lift, and he was going up in the lift. And I was just standing there and the elevator went, “Bing!” And I walked out of the lift. And just as the lift doors shut he went, “I heard you laughing.” And I always dreamed – Woody Allen is a massive hero of mine – he really is. I always thought I’d be sitting with maybe a glass of brandy one night talking to him. “You know, Woody, I fancy your material.” Not listening to him having a shit.

Notes

Recorded at the Stand in Newcastle.

RH notes that he once owned a quince tree.

RH notes that the “Facts” page on DJ’s website inspired the lift emergency question.