Title: Bill Murray’s Irish Sister

acast Time: 1:10:13
Youtube Time: 1:08:31

Original Record Date: March 9, 2020
acast Publication Date: May 20, 2020
Youtube Publication Date: May 20, 2020

Please Welcome a Man
Who has Michael Palin’s address and is going to go there to spend Christmas with him because he said it was okay. He said he’d be his dad.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Latter-day Saints Temple Podcast

Cool Kids
I was shaking my Magic 8-Ball yesterday and I asked it what it called it, and it said…

Guest Best Known
For her part as Elf in Inn Mates.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: Better
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
N/A N/A

Emergency Questions

Over the last few months, I’ve watched every episode of How I Met Your Mother. What is the most degrading thing you’ve done to yourself for no apparent reason?

This weekend – and I’m not sure if it’s the antibiotics – I typed the word “secrets” into Netflix and I got back a whole host of The Secrets of Selfridges, The Secrets of King Henry VIII’s Hampton Court, The Secrets of MI6. I bloody watched them all. A lot of very well-known information. That’s what the show should be called. “MI6 is a large building in the middle of London.” Ooooh. Does anyone else know? How did you get this information, lads? *RH noted that it would be worrying if MI6’s secrets were actually widely available in a programme like that.* Yeah, exactly. It kind of felt like a contradiction of terms. So yeah, maybe that this weekend. I can’t think before that. I mean, I do, I do loads of stuff that makes me feel terrible.

Is there an author who you would have liked to have heard read their own books on an audiobook from the past, before this technology existed?

Jesus, read the Bible. Because also his English wouldn’t be that good because of where he’s from, so it would be really slow. “Then he – sorry – I took the fish – fish and lo-aves. What is lo-aves? Loaves. Why don’t you just say bread then?

Who is the most famous person you’ve asked to dance?

Oh – famous person you’ve asked to dance. Do you know what? Fine. I’m going to do a showbiz story now, ’cause you’re so hellbent on showbiz. So this is the showbiz story. And I’m so joyful about it, because it was also joyful. This Christmas I went to Bill Murray’s Christmas party. Yes. Oooh. Oh, you did a big “oooh” for that but not a big “awww” for my tooth. You’re so showbizzy. And it was so exactly… Because I don’t know if you know this about Bill Murray, but he’s sort of, like, notorious for being quite artsy despite being so famous. As far as I know – he doesn’t have an agent. You just ring his house phone and ask him to be in stuff and he’ll just go, “Okay, I’ll be in that.” And he sort of, like, pops up in people’s selfies and turns up at house parties. Like, he’s just very well-known to be, like, sort of a gorgeous, good oddball in a way. And his house is so odd and weird and cool. And I went with my friend who knows loads of people. And Paul [Rudd] was there as well. And on the, um… His house looks sort of run-down, like, odd barn in that there’s kind of carnations hanging from the place and everyone looks like Bill Murray and you realize his nine or ten brothers are there. And my favourite thing was – you know these things called Roombas? They’re robot hoovers that just go around hoovering on their own. So they’re just little circular robots. He had two of those and there were cut-out ice-skating figures really badly gaffer-taped to them. So there were all of these ice-skating figures, just, like, going wherever the Roombas went, all around this dance floor at the party. And they were just badly homemade done, but it was glorious. And so – and he was just really into the music and he was dancing away. And so I was dancing kind of near him. And I was kind of like, “Heyyy!” And I was a bit like a creep at a party, trying to be like just so one day maybe someone would ask me who I’ve danced with. And he just loves dancing. He was in great form, so I was like, “Heyyy! Ohhh! Hey!” And sometimes he’d acknowledge me, like, “Yeah, alright. I don’t know who you are.” Because I wasn’t really invited – I crashed his party.

Who’s the most surprising famous person you’ve been in a lift with? And which I mean, you can’t have gotten into the lift with them; they had to be in the lift you were in.

*Long conversation ensued regarding the context and meaning of the question itself.* I’ve only ever been in bungalows. Can we move on? I take the stairs.

If you could take one item from any museum or art gallery – and you’re allowed to take it home with you – in the world, what would you take?

I would like, from the entrance to, um, one of the big art galleries – and I’m sure its most of them – the big box of hand sanitizer. ‘Cause that is worth two million pounds. So that’s what I’d take. My friend Kadiff, who plays Bradley in This Way Up – my flatmate, if you can see him – was saying that his dad rang him up and said, “Son, you’ve got to invest in hand sanitizer. We’re sitting on the new gold here.” Can you imagine someone being, like, on the face of, like, one of those Forbes magazines like to Bitcoin guys with just, like, hand sanitizer in the back because he’d invested early.

Notes

This is AB’s second appearance.

AB bemoans her posture and appearance in her first appearance on the podcast.

Earlier in the day AB had a tooth removed.