Title: Full Body Plaster Cast

acast Time: 57:57
Youtube Time: N/A

Original Record Date: Unknown
acast Publication Date: March 16, 2022
Youtube Publication Date: N/A

Please Welcome a Man
Who you might not be able to spot because he’s just a pile of leaves.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Leicester Sucks Testicles Podcast

Cool Kids
I was down at the Abbey Pumping Station the other day. It really wasn’t what I was hoping for, I have to say. I was hoping it would be a lot of monks farting; that’s what I was hoping. But it wasn’t that. It was just a load of old water stuff in there. And the people there call it…

Guest Best Known
For her appearance as Penny Latimer in A Pinch of Snuff, which sounds like it was made in the Victorian times, which it may have been.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: Better
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
Unnamed RH asked whether the couple had had sex on their first date
confirmed that this was their first date

Emergency Questions

If you could go into a chrysalis and turn into anything else – you can melt in there if you want – and you still have your memories, what would you turn into on the other side?

It’s a very difficult question. I could be Farrah Fawcett-Majors. I don’t want to be her. Don’t take my first answer. Or someone like that. You know, somebody – I think you always look at somebody in, like, in your childhood that you want to be like, but actually, really, I think I’d like to be Bruce Springsteen. Because, you know, I think Bruce Springsteen would be a nice thing to be. I think he’s got quite a good life. I think his last album was very good. And Born to Run – I don’t think I really am – wobble maybe, a bit. And yeah, can I be Bruce Springsteen when I come out? When is this going to happen? Can you make it happen? *RH asks RW whether she would like to be Bruce Springsteen from a day-forward point, or whether she wants to have lived Bruce Springsteen’s entire life.* Baby Bruce. No, I think I’d like to be him not quite now, although he’s quite nice now, isn’t he? He is quite nice, isn’t he? The trouble is I’m being him, not having him, aren’t I? Unless there were two little chrysalises and I could come back as Farrah Fawcett-Majors and he could be Bruce Springsteen but he’s mine.

Have you ever seen a ghost?

I sort of do believe in that kind of thing. I mean, have I actually seen one? I can’t, I can’t, you know… I think I’ve definitely felt that there was – You’re going to laugh at me. I do. I believe in it. I believe in it. […] Well, we did a kind of séance thing at Mansfield a few years ago on that Mark Little year that we did panto. And, um, they did, I did feel a presence of – We did the board and there was somebody on this board. And it was supposedly somebody, a stage crew who had committed suicide and that was his wing. And he was sending messages through me. You know I do, I do believe it. I’m going to tell this story now and you’re not going to believe it. So again, on another tour. I was going on tour and I went to – I feel like I’m going to be cursed with this story. Anyway, we went on tour. We were going to see – We were doing Menopause with Cheryl Fergison. And Cheryl and I said we were in Lincoln. I’ve worked many times at Lincoln, the Theatre Royal Lincoln. I said, “Look.” It was a day off. “We’re going to see something.” And we were to a psychic because I know the box office, free tickets. And the second half of this, um – I can’t believe I’m telling this story – second half we had many of the Nolans in the show. I’ve worked with many of the Nolans. Linda Nolan in that show and then I worked with her sister Maureen many years ago and I’ve worked with Bernie. And the second half of it this, this woman said -the psychic “I have a message for *indistinct mumbling*. And she talked in great detail about this person. And she said, “If this person is for you, you will know.” And, um, it was Bernie Nolan had come to talk to me. And she did go through details  of the show that were not in any Youtube […] She said, “Bernie wants you to do this.” There was a section of the show, um, where I play the drums and I do this with my backside to show how great I play the drums; it’s just some silliness. And she’s saying to me to do this action. I don’t know what it means. I’ve got to take a run up. She says, “Go for it, girl.” She also, in this show – Makes me sound like I’m some kind of real porn thing. In this show – this show will never tour again in this country for a long time anyway, so, like, I’m not spoiling anything – I do this orgasm as part of my sexual awakening. It’s like a three-octave orgasm. That’s what I do. This poor psychic is in the middle – she doesn’t know any of this – she says, “I don’t know what this is, but she seems to be going *makes orgasm sounds*. Maybe you’re singing very high?” I said, “No, I know exactly what that is. You don’t have to do anything.” So she said that Bernie had sent a message and I believe it. […] I’ll tell you what she said. She said these words, and I’m going to say them even though you’re going to take the piss. She said, “If you do not sing you will lose your soul.” That was her message. I thank you. And that was her message. So listen, I believe it. I’ve written it all down and then I had to go and tell Linda Nolan that her dead sister had come to me, which wasn’t quite an easy conversation to have, She said, “Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I believe she has.” And that was that. […] Because the psychic said, “Bernie wants you to know she’s on that stage with you this evening.” And I said, “Tell her to fuck off, because if she’s on that stage no one else will get a word in edgeways.” Because she was a great performer; wonderful singer. Anyway, there were lots of details that I won’t bore you with because we’d be here until tomorrow if I do. All the details to prove my story is completely true and real.

Notes

Recorded at the Y Theatre as part of the Leicester Comedy Festival.

At the end of the recording, RH collects donations for Scope.

RW and RH are former neighbours.

RW took issue with a piece of information RH quoted from her Wikipedia page. RH notes that he will submit a note that a citation for that piece of information is required.