Title: Treading in Bovine After Birth

acast Time: Time
Youtube Time: N/A

Original Record Date: Unknown
acast Publication Date: July 6, 2022
Youtube Publication Date: N/A

Please Welcome a Man
Who yesterday went to Harry Potter World, and when he got home he found that £350 had magically disappeared from his account.

Acronym Modification
Richard Herring’s Loitering in Soiled Toilets Podcast

Cool Kids
I was talking to the fans of Twitch of Fun before the show. Oh dear; it’s not a pleasant sight.

Guest Best Known
DM: For their appearance in Choccywoccydoodah.
DW: Although he was in Choccywoccydoodah, he’s not best known for that. He’s best known for All Star: Mr. and Mrs.

Audience

Better or Worse than Last Week: N/A
Like or Unlike Wikipedia: N/A

Member Member Note
N/A N/A

Emergency Questions

If you could burn one building to the ground (without harming anyone or being prosecuted for arson), which edifice would you torch?

*Could not provide an answer; advised that they would return to the question at a later time.*

I accidentally elbowed Denise van Outen in the face on Channel 5’s Celebrity Game Night. What is the worst injury you have directly or indirectly caused to a celebrity or person of renown?

DW: It wasn’t an injury as such, but do you remember the kind of slop that we had on The Bungalow? Like, the creamy muck muck? The custard? That got flung around a lot. Jim [unclear] was in one day, wasn’t he? With the cage in the corner in the basement. He was in this cage. He had to be locked in the cage for the whole three hours of the show.

DM: Well, he just said, “Listen lads, listen lads, I’ve got this brand-new suit on. I’m going to a wedding in a bit. Do us a favour: Throw whatever shit you want around, just don’t get the suit, okay? Don’t get the suit.” At which point we do this, “Get the suit.” So, got a big jar of milkshake, looked him in the eye, and *makes splat noise*. All over his suit. Walked off the show. He was gone.

DW: But there was an injury that happened. I don’t think we did it. I’ve only just remembered this incident. And there were kids having a custard pie fight, which is lovely and white, right? And one kid smacked another kid in the face really hard. So we didn’t do it. It could have been us, but I don’t think it was. And then suddenly, against this white, this thin trickle of red. So yeah, I don’t think we did that. Yes, it was definitely another child. Yes.

If you could go into a chrysalis and turn into anything else – you can melt in there if you want – and you still have your memories, what would you turn into on the other side?

DM: Well, I might go for – going back to one of your previous episodes, Richard – I’d like to come out as a  – what was it? – a tit that flings out talcum powder. I think that would be quite a nice life, actually. *RH suggests that this s already the life DM lives and DW notes that he couldn’t top the exchange.*

Would you prefer to have odorless farts of self-cleaning teeth?

DM: Definitely self-cleaning teeth. It’s so boring, isn’t it, cleaning your teeth? I love the smell of my farts, do you? *DW confirms that he doesn’t like the smell of DM’s farts.*

DW: Yeah, I’m with him, self-cleaning teeth.

What is the most unlikely thing you’ve seen up a mountain?

DW: I’ve not gone up many mountains. Oh, I did when on family holiday. My mum had an asthma attack. Is that good? Not really unlikely, is it?

DM: Well, human turds, wasn’t it, recently in the news a few months ago? Was it Snowdonia and the toilets were closed during COVID, so everyone just shat on the mountain. *DW expresses concern with DW not having seen it himself.*

Notes

Recorded at the Phoenix in London.

RH notes that although he bought the Slytherin notebook from Harry Potter World for about £15, he eventually sold it for approximately £1300.

Guests are Richard “Dick” McCourt and Dominic “Dom” Wood.

RH mentions that as a child he wrote to the television programme Swap Shop to request that they stop playing pop music.