RHLSTP! (RHLSTP!)

A reference resource for Richard Herring's Leicester Square Theatre Podcast

Emergency Questions

The below is a list of emergency questions. The way a question is formulated below represents how it was posed the first time the question was asked.

The order in which the emergency questions are displayed corresponds to the order they were originally asked during the lifespan of the podcast. For example, “Have you ever tried to suck you own cock?” was the first emergency question ever asked, so it is the first question in the list.

Where a person’s name or a website precedes the emergency question, that is its original source. All other emergency questions should be attributed to Richard Herring.

When clicked on, each question expands to reveal a list of guests to whom the question has been posed. Each name is linked to their episode’s blog post on this site. The guest’s response to the emergency question can be found in the “Emergency Questions” section of the blog post.

Have you ever tried to suck your own cock?

James Acaster
Chris Addison
Mark Addy
David Baddiel
Danny Baker
Russell Brand
Charlie Brooker
Adam Buxton
Steve Coogan
Greg Davies
Rob Delaney
Joel Dommett
Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney
Nick Frost
Stephen Fry
Mark Gatiss
Ben Goldacre
Dave Gorman
Nick Helm
Charlie Higson
Russell Howard
Sean Hughes
Miles Jupp
Stewart Lee
Graham Linehan & Armando Iannucci
Robert Llewellyn
John Lloyd
Lost Voice Guy
Stephen Merchant
Tim Minchin
Dara Ó Briain
Simon Pegg
Steve Pemberton & Reece Shearsmith
Grayson Perry
Romesh Ranganathan
David Reed
Tony Robinson
Alexei Sayle
Peter Serafinowicz
Ahir Shah
Harry Shearer
Tony Slattery
Tape Face
Dave Taylor
Louis Theroux
Mark Thomas
Johnny Vegas
Seann Walsh
Mark Watson
Robert Webb
Edgar Wright
Andy Zaltzman

 

Do you think Jonathan Ross has ever attempted to suck his own penis?

Charlie Higson
Francesca Martinez

 

If you could have a hand made of ham or an armpit that dispensed sun cream, which would you prefer?

Jayde Adams
Chris Addison
Angela Barnes
Mary Beard
Russell Brand
Kathy Burke
Adam Buxton
Susan Calman
Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt
Adrian Chiles
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Jimmy Cricket
Rob Delaney
Graham Fellows
Rebecca Front
Stephen Fry
Dave Gorman
Nick Helm
Russell Howard
Sean Hughes
Milton Jones
Shappi Khorsandi
Limmy
Robert Llewellyn
John Lloyd
Josie Long
Ed Miliband & Geoff Lloyd
David Mitchell
Ross Noble
Richard Osman
Steve Pemberton & Reece Shearsmith
Sue Perkins
Kate Robbins
Peter Serafinowicz
Paul Sinha
Dave Taylor
Hans Teeuwen
Jess Thom
Mark Thomas
Arabella Weir
Josh Widdicombe
Mike Wozniak
Edgar Wright

 

Have you ever seen a ghost?

Amanda Abbington
James Acaster
Maisie Adam
Jayde Adams
Chris Addison
Mark Addy
Richard Bacon
Angela Barnes
Lucy Beaumont
Martin Barrass
Mary Beard
Brian Blessed
Fern Brady
Russell Brand
Jenn Brister
Adam Buxton
Rebecca Callard
Susan Calman
Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt
Adrian Chiles
Bridget Christie
Janice Connolly
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Frank Cottrell-Boyce
Mackenzie Crook
Hal Cruttenden
Tom Davis
Rob Delaney
Sophie Duker
Rick Edwards
Simon Evans
Graham Fellows
John Finnemore
Flo & Joan
Dawn French
Jena Friedman
Nick Frost
Mark Gatiss
Annabel Giles
Kerry Godliman
Janey Godley
Dave Gorman
Sofie Hagen
Sofie Hagen
Miranda Hart
Rufus Hound
Russell Howard
Jessica Hynes
Robin Ince
Elis James
Milton Jones
Rosie Jones
Phill Jupitus
Miles Jupp
Russell Kane
Sarah Kendall
Shappi Khorsandi
Bryony Kimming
Nish Kumar
Lauren Laverne
Tony Law
Michael Legge
Robert Llewellyn
Cariad Lloyd
John Lloyd
Lost Voice Guy
Alice Lowe
Matt Lucas
Snjólaug Lúðvíksdóttir
Seymour Mace
Lee Mack
Stevie Martin
Ian McMillan
Steve McNeil
Kay Mellor
Stephen Merchant
Sarah Millican
David Mitchell
Caitlin Moran
Bob Mortimer
No Such Thing As A Fish
Ross Noble
Dara Ó Briain
Luisa Omielan
Richard Osman
Sara Pascoe
Sunil Patel
Lauren Pattison
Ray Peacock
Simon Pegg
Steve Pemberton & Reece Shearsmith
Sue Perkins
Scroobius Pip
Lucy Porter
Caroline Quentin
David Reed
Vic Reeves
Kate Robbins
John Robins
Lou Sanders
Alexei Sayle
Scummy Mummies
Ahir Shah
Paul Sinha
Dan Skinner
Tony Slattery
Michael Spicer
Tiff Stevenson
Vikki Stone
Isy Suttie
Tape Face
Jess Thom
Sindhu Vee
Jack Whitehall
Josh Widdicombe
Shaun Williamson
Katy Wix
Mike Wozniak
Edgar Wright
Bilal Zafar
Andy Zaltzman

 

If you were a ghost what is the first thing you would do with your ghostly powers?

Rob Delaney

 

What is your favourite cheese?

Russell Brand
Adam Buxton
Rob Delaney
Dave Gorman

 

Have you ever seen a bigfoot?

James Acaster
Chris Addison
Richard Bacon
Mary Beard
Brian Blessed
Russell Brand
Adam Buxton
Susan Calman
Adrian Chiles
Steve Coogan
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Mackenzie Crook
Rob Delaney
Susie Dent
Jenny Eclair
Jessica Fostekew
Dawn French
Brett Goldstein
Dave Gorman
Sofie Hagen
Miranda Hart
Russell Howard
Milton Jones
Phill Jupitus
Miles Jupp
Shappi Khorsandi
Lauren Laverne
Tony Law
Robert Llewellyn
Sarah Millican
Diane Morgan
Al Murray
Dara Ó Briain
Richard Osman
Sara Pascoe
Simon Pegg
Steve Pemberton & Reece Shearsmith
Scroobius Pip
Jess Robinson
Jon Ronson
Katherine Ryan
Lou Sanders
Alexei Sayle
Dan Schreiber
Peter Serafinowicz
Isy Suttie
Dave Taylor
Mark Thomas
Josh Widdicombe
Andy Zaltzman

 

If you had to have sex with an animal, if you had to, what animal would you have sex with, if you had to?

Adam Buxton
Rob Delaney
Dave Gorman
Helen & Olly
Russell Howard
Olga Koch
Stevie Martin
David Mitchell
Scroobius Pip
Mark Thomas

 

What heat sauce do you have when you go to Nando’s?

Steve Pemberton & Reece Shearsmith
Peter Serafinowicz

 

If men evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?

Peter Serafinowicz

 

Have any of your siblings ever seen a ghost?

Chris Addison
Adam Buxton
Dave Gorman
Sofie Hagen
Rufus Hound
Russell Howard
Armando Iannucci
David Mitchell
Dan Skinner
Michael Spicer

 

Have you or any of your siblings ever seen a bigfoot?

Brett Goldstein
David Mitchell

 

Have you ever come up with a terrorist atrocity?

Victoria Coren Mitchell
Rob Delaney & Sharon Horgan
Dave Gorman
Sofie Hagen
Limmy
Diane Morgan
Bob Mortimer
Al Murray
Romesh Ranganathan
Paul Sinha
Robert Webb
Josh Widdicombe

 

If Frankie Boyle is the Mick Jagger of comedy, the outspoken voice of the disenfranchised youth, dehumanized by the press and feared by parents nation-wide, then Dave Gorman is Ringo Starr. He’s an everyman. He’s well known and provides entertainment in a variety of guises, but he still gives the impression he’d be incredibly polite if he ever met your mother. Discuss.

Adam Buxton
Ed Gamble
Dave Gorman
Russell Howard

 

When you eat asparagus, does your wee then smell of asparagus?

Chris Addison
Russell Brand
Adam Buxton
Susan Calman
Miranda Hart
Milton Jones
Mark Thomas
Edgar Wright

 

When your wife eats asparagus, does her wee smell of asparagus afterwards? And if you didn’t know, would she let you smell her wee to find out?

Chris Addison
Russell Brand
Adam Buxton
Susan Calman
Mark Thomas

 

Would you prefer to have a hand made out of sun cream or an armpit that dispensed ham?

Chris Addison
Romesh Ranganathan
Robert Webb

 

Have you ever eaten asparagus?

Chris Addison

 

If you were doing a Leicester Square Theatre Podcast, what emergency question would you ask?

Chris Addison
Miles Jupp

 

What do you think happens to you when you die?

Chris Addison
Lauren Pattison

 

Ben Evans: Why were you the bad guys in The Borrowers?

Stephen Fry

 

Ben Evans: Why did you agree to do Thunderpants?

Stephen Fry

 

Ben Evans: What is it like being Stephen Fry?

Stephen Fry

 

Did Julius Caesar ever try to suck his own cock?

Mary Beard

 

Ben Evans: Sadie Evans: What is “I hate you” in Latin? I want to say it to my brother.

Mary Beard

 

Ben Evans: What do you think is the most inimitable thing the Romans came up with or did?

Mary Beard

 

If you had to have sex with a Roman god, which would you have sex with?

Mary Beard

 

Ben Evans: Archie Vandervlett: What’s it like being John Lloyd? (I want to be in the papers.)

John Lloyd

 

How many chemicals are there in a carrot?

Russell Brand
Jenny Eclair
Sean Hughes
Sue Perkins
Mark Thomas

 

Ben Evans: Evan Warburton: Did you eat jellybeans after being in Hop?

Russell Brand

 

Ben Evans: Antony [unintelligible]: Do you like having your hair so long and are you going to cut it?

Russell Brand

 

Ben Evans: Antony [unintelligible]: What is your best joke?

Russell Brand

 

Ben Evans: Who is Ant Man and why does he merit a film about himself?

Edgar Wright

 

Ben Evans: Archie Vandervlett: What is your favourite film from the following genres: comedy, horror, sci-fi?

Edgar Wright

 

Ben Evans: Archie Vandervlett: Do you prefer Chinese or Thai food?

Mark Thomas

 

Ben Evans: In primary school I came up with a story about another 11-year old called Mark Thomas. Shortly after telling my father the story, I found out your name was the same as my character. So my question is: Why did you steal my character’s name?

Mark Thomas

 

Ben Evans: Jonathan Wright: Would you rather be a cow or a badger and why?

Angela Barnes
Susan Calman
Jenny Eclair
Sofie Hagen
Miranda Hart
Rosie Jones
Ross Noble
Isy Suttie
Mark Thomas
Josh Widdicombe

 

Have you ever tried to give yourself cunnilingus?

Isy Suttie

 

What would it take for you to fellate the actor Keith Allen?

Jessica Fostekew
Rebecca Front
Miranda Hart
Sean Hughes
Matt Lucas
Bob Mortimer
Sunil Patel
Paul Sinha
Dan Skinner

 

What is it like being *guest*?

Miranda Hart
Nick Helm
Sean Hughes
Miles Jupp
Harry Shearer
Mike Wozniak

 

On Live at the Apollo,what does it feel like to be standing behind the massive sign with “Live At the Apollo” written on it?

Shappi Khorsandi

 

Do you have any unusual phobias?

Victoria Coren Mitchell
Miranda Hart
Rufus Hound
Miles Jupp
Shappi Khorsandi
Michael Legge
Ross Noble
Dara Ó Briain

 

What is the closest you have ever come to actually dying?

Shappi Khorsandi
Michael Legge
Josie Long

 

Would you rather have a hand made out of ham, an armpit that dispensed sun cream, or a tit that dispensed talcum powder?

Rufus Hound
Shappi Khorsandi

 

Ben Evans: Do you know how to speak in Persian? And if so, what is “I have an orange fingernail” in Persian?

Shappi Khorsandi

 

Ben Evans: You used to do a CBBC show called Hounded. I enjoyed it very much. Are you ever going to do it again?

Rufus Hound

 

Ben Evans: This isn’t a question, but I understand you did some promotional videos for Mario Kart 7

Rufus Hound

 

Would you rather have a tit that dispensed talcum powder or a finger that can travel through time?

Jayde Adams
Danny Baker
Fern Brady
Adam Buxton
Rebecca Callard
Susan Calman
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Frank Cottrell-Boyce
Greg Davies
Sophie Duker
Jenny Eclair
Rebecca Front
Stephen Grant
Sofie Hagen
Miranda Hart
Helen & Olly
Jessica Hynes
Spencer Jones
Phill Jupitus
Miles Jupp
Olga Koch
Josie Long
Stephen Merchant
Bob Mortimer
Dara Ó Briain
Simon Pegg
Sue Perkins
David Reed
Jon Ronson
Suzi Ruffell
Alexei Sayle
Harry Shearer
Paul Sinha
Dave Taylor
Arabella Weir

 

What inspired you to do what you do?

Miranda Hart

 

Ben Evans: Can you talk about that thing you did where you were singing with a bunch of other people and some people gave you money?

Miranda Hart

 

Ben Evans: What did you do on the CBBC programme Stupid and what was it like?

Miranda Hart

 

If you had to marry one of the Muppets, which one would you marry?

Maria Bamford
Marcus Brigstocke
Mackenzie Crook
Miranda Hart
Ed Miliband & Geoff Lloyd
Luisa Omielan
Suzi Ruffell

 

Ben Evans: How was it being in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix?

Miles Jupp

 

Ben Evans: Hello Miles Jupp. Or should I say, Archie the Inventor? You ruined my childhood. None of your inventions worked. Any new projects of yours?

Miles Jupp

 

Ben Evans: What is your favourite character on Balamory? Not yourself.

Miles Jupp

 

Ben Evans: How do you think Simon Pegg was chosen to play the amazing role of Thompson in the new Tintin film?

Stephen Merchant

 

Ben Evans: Are you proud to be the voice everyone knows on the adverts for Barkleys and Waterstones?

Stephen Merchant

 

Do you ever get confused with *another person with the same name as guest*?

Richard Bacon
Brendon Burns
Adam Buxton
Greg Davies
Greg Davies
John Finnemore
Terry Hall
Alex Horne
Rosie Jones
John Kearns
Sarah Kendall
Michael Legge
Stevie Martin
Bob Mortimer
Tom Parry
Sunil Patel
Dan Schreiber
Michael Spicer
Mark Watson
Robert Webb
Rich Wilson

 

Ben Evans: Will there be another TV series of Bug? It is very good.

Adam Buxton

 

What was being in The IT Crowd like?

Adam Buxton

 

If you were going to go on Dragon’s Den, what would you pitch on Dragon’s Den?

Susan Calman
Jenny Eclair
Helen & Olly
Robert Llewellyn
Josh Widdicombe

 

Who would you have sex with if you had a time-travelling penis?

Steve Coogan
Greg Davies
Helen & Olly
Nick Helm
Robert Llewellyn
Jon Ronson
Alexei Sayle

 

What age were you breastfed until?

Robert Llewellyn
Sunil Patel
Mike Wozniak

 

What is your worst hotel/travelling experience?

Greg Davies
Stephen Grant
Alexei Sayle

 

Did you go travelling as a teenager?

Nick Helm
Josie Long

 

Ben Evans: Sam Wright: Do you use the words “diddly” and “doodly” around the house?

Harry Shearer

 

Ben Evans: Sam Wright: What is your favourite Simpsons episode?

Harry Shearer

 

Where do you get your crazy ideas from?

James Acaster
Susan Calman
Steve Coogan
Victoria Coren Mitchell
John Finnemore
Sofie Hagen
Alex Horne
Spencer Jones
John Kearns
Cariad Lloyd
Sarah Millican
Katherine Ryan
Jess Thom
Josh Widdicombe

 

Ben Evans: Archie Vandervlett: Are you excited to know there is going to be a better Godzilla film than the one you were in?

Susan Calman

 

How did the death of Thomas Beckett affect the Anglo-Papal relations in the 12th-century?

Susan Calman

 

Have you ever put anything up your urethra?

Susan Calman
Nick Helm

 

What have you tried for the first time this year/recently?

Susan Calman

 

What celebrity would you like to be stroking your head as you die?

Richard Bacon
Aisling Bea
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Ben Goldacre
Milton Jones
Michael Legge
Cariad Lloyd
Sue Perkins
Jon Ronson
Suzi Ruffell
Katherine Ryan
Lou Sanders
Mike Wozniak
Andy Zaltzman

 

If your moustache could travel through time, where would you send it?

Mike Wozniak

 

What is your favourite towel?

Brett Goldstein
Michael Legge
Alice Lowe
Diane Morgan
Mike Wozniak

 

Has the moon ever spoken to you?

Sue Perkins
Mike Wozniak

 

Would you rather date a man who was a 6-foot tall penis with a face like Mark Reckless or a man who instead of having a penis had a tiny man growing out of there?

James Acaster
Dane Baptiste
Brendon Burns
Roisin Conaty
Steve Coogan
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Rob Delaney & Sharon Horgan
Rebecca Front
Mark Gatiss
Ben Goldacre
Brett Goldstein
Milton Jones
Sarah Kendall
Emma Kennedy
Michael Legge
Limmy
Joe Lycett
Sarah Millican
Bob Mortimer
Richard Osman
Sara Pascoe
Lauren Pattison
Sue Perkins
Paul Putner & Trevor Lock
Katherine Ryan
Lou Sanders
Scummy Mummies
Ahir Shah
Paul Sinha
Dan Skinner
Michael Spicer
Robert Webb
Josh Widdicombe
Andy Zaltzman

 

If in the event of a zombie apocalypse, what tactics would you employ?

Mark Gatiss
Toby Hadoke
Katherine Ryan

 

Do you think that there’s a true conspiracy theory?

James Acaster
Mark Gatiss
Rachel Parris

 

Do you have conceptual art ideas?

Roisin Conaty
Mark Gatiss
Diane Morgan
Romesh Ranganathan
Josh Widdicombe
Andy Zaltzman

 

How sensitive are your nipples?

James Acaster
Brendon Burns
Sofie Hagen
Lou Sanders
Andy Zaltzman

 

Do you ever get mistaken for a different celebrity?

James Acaster
Dane Baptiste
Sofie Hagen
Sarah Millican
Paul Sinha

 

Were you ever rude to a celebrity when you were young?

James Acaster
Steve Coogan
Brett Goldstein
Michael Legge
Sara Pascoe

 

What is the worst place you’ve been sick?

James Acaster
Josh Widdicombe
Andy Zaltzman

 

I’m not going to ask you the full question but, as a vegan, if someone had given you a magic choice between having a breast, nipple, that produced talcum powder, or a hand made out of ham, and you’d opted for the hand made out of ham, would you eat your own ham hand? Or would you feel that would make you a bad vegan?

Sara Pascoe

 

Have you ever seen a goat?

Andy Zaltzman

 

Have you committed any crimes you have not previously admitted to?

Dane Baptiste
Kerry Godliman
Phill Jupitus
Luisa Omielan
Robert Popper
Dan Schreiber
Will Smith
Hans Teeuwen
Andy Zaltzman

 

Ben Evans: What was up with Prize Island?

Richard Osman

 

Ben Evans: Evan Warburton: Do you get many people joking about your show being called Pointless?

Richard Osman

 

Ben Evans: Nicky Tsoi: How many years have you been in Pointless?

Richard Osman

 

Unspecified Child: If I got turned into a turkey, what would you do and why?

Sofie Hagen

 

Which mythical Irish creature would you rather be: a leprechaun or a Jesus?

Sofie Hagen

 

What do you think Lord Alan Sugar should call his autobiography?

Roisin Conaty
Bob Mortimer
Romesh Ranganathan

 

Do you have any feelings about how cutlery should be placed in the dishwasher?

Bob Mortimer
Al Murray
Lou Sanders

 

Who could you have assassinated?

Roisin Conaty
Rosie Jones
Emma Kennedy
Romesh Ranganathan

 

What is the secret of happiness?

Brett Goldstein
Romesh Ranganathan
Paul Sinha

 

If you had a finger that could travel through time…

Bethany Black
Adrian Chiles
Roisin Conaty
Janice Connolly
Robin Ince
Greg Jenner
Seymour Mace
Steve McNeil
Grayson Perry
Johnny Vegas
Robert Webb

 

Have you ever tried to suck Nick Clegg’s cock?

Louis Theroux

 

Do you think if you have sex with a robot that should count as cheating on your partner?

Amanda Abbington
Chris Addison
Mark Addy
Dane Baptiste
Sara Barron
Bill Burr
Roisin Conaty
Hal Cruttenden
Drunk Women Solving Crime
Alice Fraser
Nick Frost
Brett Goldstein
Lauren Laverne
Tim Minchin
David Mitchell
Diane Morgan
No Such Thing As A Fish
Luisa Omielan
Scroobius Pip
Jan Ravens
Tony Robinson
Ahir Shah
Joe Thomas
Mark Watson

 

If you could choose between having a tit that dispensed talcum powder or a hand made of ham…

Roisin Conaty

 

What weighs more: 1kg of steel or 1 kg of feathers?

Limmy

 

Have you ever put your genitals in the mouth of a dead animal?

John Finnemore
Stuart Goldsmith
Phill Jupitus
Lee Mack
Diane Morgan

 

Have you ever put your genitals in the mouth of a live animal? And which would be worse?

Janey Godley
Stuart Goldsmith
Lee Mack

 

What is worse, bestiality or necrophilia?

Stuart Goldsmith
Rosie Jones
Nish Kumar
Diane Morgan
Robert Popper
Hans Teeuwen
Jack Whitehall

 

Why can’t everyone be babies?

Matthew Crosby
Stuart Goldsmith
Diane Morgan
Luisa Omielan
Jess Thom
Jack Whitehall

 

What is the worst emergency you’ve ever been involved in?

Mark Addy
Hal Cruttenden
Stuart Goldsmith
David Mitchell
Luisa Omielan
Jack Whitehall

 

Kettle Crisps are not as nice as they once were. Have I changed or have they? That’s a rhetorical question. If you could travel back in time to compare any food of today with an equivalent in the past, what time would you go back to and what food would you taste?

Richard Bacon
Aisling Bea
Marcus Brigstocke
Hal Cruttenden
Janey Godley
Stuart Goldsmith
Sarah Kendall
Tim Minchin
David Mitchell
Diane Morgan
Luisa Omielan
Tom Parry
Dave Taylor
Jack Whitehall

 

Has anything you’ve written then come true?

Diane Morgan
Will Smith

 

What song would you like to replace our national anthem with?

Diane Morgan
Scroobius Pip

 

If you had to go on a week’s holiday with one of the puppets from Spitting Image, which would you choose and bear in mind the puppet would choose the holiday destination?

Richard Bacon
Marcus Brigstocke
Hal Cruttenden
John Finnemore
Jessica Fostekew
Nish Kumar
Cariad Lloyd
David Mitchell
Ray Peacock
Scroobius Pip
Robert Popper
Vic Reeves
John Robins

 

Why do elephants have such low rates of cancer?

John Finnemore
Sarah Kendall
David Mitchell
Ray Peacock
Robert Popper
Dan Schreiber
Hans Teeuwen

 

Can you name another animal that is very cancer resistant?

David Mitchell
Ray Peacock
Robert Popper

 

Sport is intrinsically stupid. Discuss.

John Finnemore
Luisa Omielan
Scroobius Pip
Robert Popper
Jack Whitehall

 

If you were the Prime Minister, would you use nuclear weapons?

Aisling Bea
Russell Kane
Sarah Kendall
Tim Minchin
Luisa Omielan
Robert Popper
John Robins
Scroobius Pip
Dave Taylor

 

Kickstarter: Tim Turner says, “Richard Dawkins claims to have seen dogs doing a 69. What’s the worst lie you have told to impress people?”

Mark Addy
Dane Baptiste
Aisling Bea
Hal Cruttenden
Phill Jupitus
Cariad Lloyd
Tim Minchin
Luisa Omielan
John Robins
Hans Teeuwen

 

Would you consider sex with a ghost as cheating on your partner?

Chris Addison
David Cross
Hal Cruttenden
John Finnemore
Sarah Kendall
David Mitchell
Ray Peacock
Dan Schreiber
Will Smith
Hans Teeuwen
Jack Whitehall

 

Have you ever put your genitals in the mouth of a live animal?

John Finnemore
Dave Taylor

 

If you could choose between having a tit that dispensed talcum powder and a finger that could cure but also cause cancer…

Jack Whitehall

 

What was the most deluded thing you thought of yourself as a child?

Aisling Bea
Hal Cruttenden
Scroobius Pip

 

What fictional childhood character’s skull would you like to see in a museum?

Aisling Bea

 

If you could have a hand made of bacon or a cock made out of herring, which would you prefer?

Richard Bacon

 

Would you rather date a woman who was a 6-foot tall vulva, or a woman who instead of having a vagina had another tiny woman in her place?

Mark Addy
Nish Kumar
Tony Law
Iain Lee
Tim Minchin
Ahir Shah
Ben Bailey Smith

 

BBC: Have you got what it takes to be a spy?

Sofie Hagen
Iain Lee
Dan Schreiber
Ben Bailey Smith

 

BuzzKenya.com: Is there anything purple within ten feet of you?

Marcus Brigstocke
Ed Gamble
Lauren Laverne
Iain Lee
Ben Bailey Smith

 

What trajectory are you hoping to push yourself onto?

Iain Lee

 

MarshallJonesJr.com: Have you ever tried sushi?

Tom Davis
Susie Dent
Dawn French
Ed Gamble
Sofie Hagen
Russell Kane
Nish Kumar
Lauren Laverne
Tony Law
Iain Lee
Graham Linehan
Tim Minchin
Tom Parry
Dan Schreiber
Dan Skinner
Will Smith
Dave Taylor
Hans Teeuwen

 

LifeHacks.io: If you could jump into a pool of something, what would it be?

Marcus Brigstocke
Susie Dent
Ed Gamble
Kerry Godliman
Sofie Hagen
Russell Kane
Nish Kumar
Iain Lee
Graham Linehan
Sarah Millican
Vic Reeves
Ben Bailey Smith
Will Smith
Hans Teeuwen
Jess Thom

 

If you had the option of adopting a baby fox or a baby koala, which one would you choose?

Sofie Hagen
Lauren Laverne
Iain Lee
Dave Taylor

 

What’s the best museum you’ve ever been to?

Marcus Brigstocke
Sophie Duker
Russell Kane
Nish Kumar
Iain Lee
Alice Lowe
Vic Reeves
Will Smith
Jess Thom

 

If you could have a law named after you, what would it be?

Tony Law

 

Do you ever worry that you have already lived your life and are now in a care home with Alzheimer’s disease and what you perceive as reality is just a distorted memory of the first time this happened?

Tony Law
Tom Parry
Ben Bailey Smith
Hans Teeuwen

 

BuzzNigeria.com: Which are your two favourite careers and why?

Matthew Crosby
Ed Gamble
Lauren Laverne

 

Ali’s Randomage: Have you ever flown a kite?

Mark Addy
Katy Brand
Matthew Crosby
Sophie Duker
Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney
Dawn French
Sofie Hagen
Armando Iannucci
Russell Kane
Lauren Laverne
Sarah Millican
Tim Minchin
Tom Parry
Vic Reeves
Dan Schreiber
Ben Bailey Smith
Will Smith
Dave Taylor
Hans Teeuwen

 

What do you consider to be the most mediocre chocolate bar?

Lauren Laverne

 

Should penis transplants be allowed?

Marcus Brigstocke
Sofie Hagen
Nish Kumar
Lauren Laverne
Vic Reeves
Ben Bailey Smith
Hans Teeuwen

 

Ali’s Randomage: Have you ever demolished a wall or a building?

Matthew Crosby
Sofie Hagen
Ben Bailey Smith

 

Why do we have frozen peas?

Marcus Brigstocke
Matthew Crosby
David Cross
Susie Dent
Tim Minchin
Rachel Parris
Vic Reeves

 

What is the worst rumour you’ve heard about yourself?

Marcus Brigstocke
Susie Dent
Elis James
Nish Kumar

 

When you masturbate, is the first stroke away or towards?

David Cross
Nish Kumar
Tim Minchin

 

Would you consider sex with a bigfoot as cheating on your partner?

David Cross

 

Have you ever been attacked by an animal?

Tom Parry
Vic Reeves

 

Have you ever been in the vicinity of a bigfoot, but not seen it?

Ed Gamble
Nish Kumar
Graham Linehan
Vic Reeves

 

What would you call a man who could suck his own cock?

Susie Dent

 

Who would you rather died: Windsor Davies or Matthew Crosby’s wife?

Dane Baptiste
Matthew Crosby
Sofie Hagen
Elis James
Russell Kane
Graham Linehan
Tim Minchin
Tom Parry

 

Where do you stand on transubstantiation?

Sofie Hagen
Jessica Knappett
Graham Linehan

 

I have given up on Domino’s pizza. I have had enough. It’s always fucking horrible. Is there anything that you have given up on in a similar way?

Russell Kane

 

If you were granted the powers of a King Midas, but could choose what everything was going to turn into, what would everything turn into?

Dane Baptiste
Kerry Godliman
Armando Iannucci
Tony Robinson
Hans Teeuwen

 

Have you ever killed someone, but never spoke about it and would you like to speak about it now?

Armando Iannucci

 

Do you think the Tim Allen film The Santa Clause could ever happen in real life?

Tom Davis
Kerry Godliman
Armando Iannucci

 

How do you sleep at night?

Chris Addison
Dane Baptiste
Sarah Millican
Hans Teeuwen

 

What was the most impressive celebrity that ever came to your school?

Chris Addison
Dane Baptiste
Sarah Millican
Lucy Porter
Will Smith

 

Did any future celebrities go to your school?

Dane Baptiste
Sarah Millican
Lucy Porter
Will Smith
Joe Thomas

 

Did the siblings of any celebrities teach at your school?


Dane Baptiste
Lucy Porter
Will Smith

 

Could you ever have sex with someone who called breasts “boobies”?

Dane Baptiste
Ed Gamble
Kerry Godliman
Will Smith

 

If you could choose the liquid that you weed, what liquid would you wee?

Dane Baptiste
Sophie Willan

 

If you were God, what flavour would you have made ejaculate?

Chris Addison
Jonathan Ames
Dane Baptiste
Konnie Huq
Laura Lexx
Daniel Sloss

 

If you had to do a human centipede with two other people, if you had to, but you could choose the two other people, and you’re in the middle, who would you choose?

Chris Addison
All Killa No Filla
Peter Baynham
Fern Brady
Katy Brand
Susan Calman
Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt
Paul Chowdhry
Andrew Collins
Tom Davis
Sophie Duker
Jenny Eclair
Dawn French
Jena Friedman
Nick Frost
Ed Gamble
Kerry Godliman
Dave Gorman
Greg Jenner
Adam Kay
Jessica Knappett
Rahul Kohli
Limmy
Joe Lycett
Steve McNeil
Ed Miliband & Geoff Lloyd
Sarah Millican
Caitlin Moran
My Dad Wrote a Porno
Rachel Parris
Caroline Quentin
Jess Robinson
Lucy Porter
Peter Serafinowicz
Dan Skinner
Jess Thom
Joe Thomas
Sophie Willan
Glenn Wool

 

If you dropped your phone down the port-o-loo at Glastonbury on the third day, would you retrieve the phone?

Jena Friedman
Caitlin Moran
Jess Thom

 

What was the least impressive celebrity that ever came to your school?

Will Smith

 

What is the worst thing you’ve ever tried to squeeze down the drain of a shower?

Will Smith

 

Have you ever been in a canoe?

Chris Addison
Susan Calman
Tom Davis
Ed Gamble
Kerry Godliman

 

Which is your favourite bun that is named after a place?

Katy Brand
Kerry Godliman
Sophie Willan

 

What is your third earliest memory?

Kerry Godliman

 

If you had your dream dinner party and you could invite anyone you wanted, living or dead, who would you employ to do the washing up? They are not allowed into the party but they will get tantalizing glimpses of the of the conversation but never hear the punchline so they’re not allowed in and it would be very frustrating for them.

Kerry Godliman

 

What is the worst misconception about you that is not true?

Ed Gamble
Kerry Godliman

 

Do you remember the first time you were stung?

Chris Addison

 

Have you ever seen a famous TV animal in real life?

Chris Addison
Lucy Porter

 

Have you ever been possessed by a demon, or been accused of being a demon, and are you a demon? Because I think you’re a demon.

Ed Gamble

 

Have you ever been in the vicinity of a celebrity when they farted?

Ed Gamble

 

Have you ever sucked on a fisherman’s friend (lower case)?

Ed Gamble
Tony Law
Joe Lycett

 

If you had to choose between killing all of the Eggheads and all of the Chasers on The Chase, which group of quiz nerds would die?

Ed Gamble

 

Have you ever fallen out of a hammock?

Ed Gamble
John Moloney

 

Do sperm have dreams?

Ed Gamble
Bec Hill
Sarah Millican
No Such Thing As A Fish
Lucy Porter

 

What is your favourite anagram?

Ed Gamble
Tiff Stevenson

 

Do you have a preferred ear?

Ed Gamble

 

Why hast thou forsaken me?

Ed Gamble
Ed Gamble

 

Do you Google yourself?

Ed Gamble

 

Would you rather be lactose intolerant or the Prime Minister of the Central African Republic?

Susan Calman
Deborah Frances-White
Ed Miliband & Geoff Lloyd
Joe Thomas

 

Do you think thunderstorms were invented by NASA to muffle the sound of space battles?

Deborah Frances-White

 

Have you ever watched something on Facebook Live that hasn’t been totally shit?

Deborah Frances-White

 

What is your most appealing habit?

Tom Davis
Deborah Frances-White

 

Does sex with a robot count as cheating if the robot is an exact copy of your partner in looks and personality?

Tom Davis
Drunk Women Solving Crime
Deborah Frances-White
Sarah Millican

 

How about if the robot is an exact copy of what your partner looked like when you first met them?

Tom Davis
Drunk Women Solving Crime
Deborah Frances-White
Sarah Millican

 

Would you rather live in the waxy ear of a grumpy giant, eating only what flies in there by accident and not being able to make a noise for fear of a huge cotton bud, or live in Middlesbrough?

Tom Davis
Deborah Frances-White

 

If you had to drink the entire contents of a well-stocked sperm bank, or be placed in a coma for ten years, where everyone thinks you’re not conscious but you actually hear and feel everything, which option would you take?

Dawn French

 

Would you rather have a mirror in which you can see all your dead relatives and friends but not be able to talk to them but see them sadly waiting or would you like a voucher for 2-for-1 pizzas at Pizza Express, Monday through Thursday?

Tom Davis

 

Would you rather have pubic hair made from unremovable barbed wire, or be attacked by a rabid badger in your sleep once a week?

Tom Davis

 

Have you ever met a shepherd?

Amanda Abbington
Michael Ian Black
Susan Calman
Tom Davis
Adam Kay
Rose Matafeo
Lucy Porter

 

If you had to have sex with either Zippy, Bungle, George, Geoffrey, or Rod from Rainbow, whilst Jane and Freddy at sex with each other next to you – but they’re married, that’s allowed, but can’t join in – which of the people from Rainbow would you have sex with?

David Baddiel
Tom Davis
Limmy
Michael Spicer

 

If I’m born a bigot, does anyone have the right to tell me my lifestyle choice is wrong and I should change and be like them?

Tom Davis

 

If you had to permanently seal up one of the holes in your body, not including the pores in your skin of your hair follicles, which would you choose?N

Tom Davis
Rosie Jones

 

Why did Jesus say, “Why hast thou forsaken me?”

Tom Davis
Ed Gamble
John Moloney

 

Have you ever been in a police car?

Susan Calman
Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt
Caroline Quentin

 

Would you rather have an elbow made of marshmallow, or a foot that transformed into a werefoot every full moon?

Susan Calman

 

Would you prefer to have lungs that turned oxygen into jam that would come out the pores of your skin and be scraped into bottles and sold, as long as you didn’t tell your customers where it was coming from, or an anus that weeped mānuka honey, which could also be sold, although imagine the anger if people found out where you’d been getting that sweet, sweet honey?

Susan Calman

 

If you had to live out the rest of your life being either Toby Young or Dom Joly, would you just kill yourself now?

Sarah Millican

 

How do you spell diarrhoea?

Lucy Porter
Danielle Ward

 

Have you ever had an altercation with a shepherd?

Peter Serafinowicz

 

What is your favourite memory of being halfway somewhere?

Bec Hill

 

Have you ever irked a postman?

Bec Hill
Paul Merton
Joe Thomas

 

What makes you so special?

Bec Hill

 

What are your nine favourite things about Norway?

Bec Hill
Joe Thomas

 

When was the last time you cried?

Bec Hill

 

Have you ever been brass rubbing?

Bec Hill
Sara Pascoe

 

If you had to have sex with a right-wing politician, if you had to, which Tory, right-wing politician would you have sex with?

Bec Hill
My Dad Wrote a Porno
Katherine Ryan

 

If your genitals had to turn into a sea creature for one day every month, but you could choose the sea creature they turned into, what sea creature would you like that to be?

Bec Hill
Reginald D. Hunter
Limmy

 

What is your favourite use of sand?

Bec Hill

 

Have you ever seen the TV show Friends?

Andrew Collins
Bec Hill
Robert Webb

 

Would you like to have a bath with my dad?

Bec Hill
Reginald D. Hunter
Robert Webb

 

Has anyone you’ve had sex with had sex with someone famous?

Bec Hill
Rosie Jones
Sara Pascoe

 

What is the strangest thing you’ve ever found in your fridge?

Bec Hill
Ed Gamble

 

Have you ever pretended to be your own twin?

Bec Hill

 

Are you proud of yourself?

Bec Hill

 

Are you a fan of Norman Wisdom, by which I mean the knowledge and understanding of the 10th- and 11th-century people from Normandy?

Bec Hill

 

Would you rather be able to turn your head like an owl or have a neck that telescopes up to the length of a giraffe’s neck, but can go back down again to normal?

Paul Merton
Katy Wix

 

What does “mansplaining” mean?

Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney
Joe Thomas

 

Have you ever seen a starling?

Joe Thomas

 

Is there a race of people who you secretly believe should be exterminated in death camps?

Joe Thomas

 

Do you think Toy Story 2 could ever happen in real life?

Joe Thomas

 

What is your favourite track by the performing artist Joe Dolce?

Joe Thomas

 

If you could teleport anywhere in the universe right now, where would you go?

Joe Thomas

 

Who do you think deserves a statue of themselves who hasn’t got a statue of themselves currently?

Joe Thomas

 

Would you rather your anus was replaced by a cat’s anus, or your public hair was replaced by a cat’s whiskers?

Joe Thomas

 

What is your favourite archaic word or phrase?

Joe Thomas

 

Would you rather be immune from ever getting chlamydia or have free Kit Kats for life?

Joe Thomas

 

What is the worst Adam Sandler film, in your opinion?

Janey Godley & Ashley Storrie
Jessica Knappett

 

Have you ever been brainwashed?

All Killa No Filla
Jessica Knappett

 

Have you ever seen anything truly unexpected in a bagging area?

Jessica Knappett

 

Is it just me, or is the aftertaste to a Pringles crisp just a little bit claggy?

Jessica Knappett

 

Which was your favourite McWhirter twin?

Adam Buxton

 

What is your favourite fraction?

Adam Buxton

 

If you had to be anally violated by a popular chocolate bar, if you had to, which chocolate bar would you choose to be inserted in your anus?

Martin Barrass
Katy Brand
Desiree Burch
Ed Byrne
Rahul Kohli
Limmy
Zoe Lyons
Al Murray
Richard Osman
Lauren Pattison
Dan Skinner
Katy Wix

 

After you have been anally violated by the chocolate bar, who would you like to then eat the chocolate bar, not knowing where it had been, whilst you secretly watch them?

Zoe Lyons

 

What swear word would you like repeatedly shouted by a drunk man at your funeral? The drunk man is turning up regardless and is going to shout something, so you might as well choose.

Katy Brand
Zoe Lyons
Sara Pascoe

 

What one photo would you send out to aliens?

Zoe Lyons

 

Where do you see yourself in 500 years’ time?

Andrew Collins

 

Do you think they’ll ever make a Hunger Games-style film, but based around the ITV daytime quiz show Tipping Point?

Andrew Collins

  

If you didn’t have to have sex with Zippy, Bungle, George, Geoffrey, or Rod, but not Jane or Freddy, who would now be asleep, but they said they were up for it if you fancied it, but not an orgy situation, it would have to be one-on-one, would you have sex with one of them, and which one?

David Baddiel
Michael Spicer

 

If you could have all your teeth replaced by psychic orbs that could tell you all future events by telepathy but would scream it a high-pitched volume every time you opened your mouth, would you go ahead with the teeth replacement operation?

Martin Barrass
Paul Chowdhry
Julian Clary
Limmy
Max & Ivan
Dan Skinner

 

What’s your favourite colour?

Martin Barrass

 

What is the most pretentious book you’ve ever bought but not read?

Martin Barrass
Janey Godley & Ashley Storrie
Caroline Quentin

 

Are you a racist?

Dan Skinner

 

What is the most unusual thing you’ve ever used as a toilet paper substitute?

Rob Brydon
Dan Skinner

 

What is the strangest thing you have ever found in the embers of a bonfire?

Katy Brand
Desiree Burch
Ed Byrne
Julian Clary
Pippa Evans
Reginald D. Hunter
Armando Iannucci
Limmy
My Dad Wrote a Porno
Sara Pascoe
Robert Webb
Sophie Willan
Katy Wix
Glenn Wool

 

What is the sexiest TV puppet?

Kathy Burke
Julian Clary
Danielle Ward

 

If you had a finger that could cure rectal cancer but only if you pushed it hard up the anus of the cancer sufferer, would you cure anyone, everyone, or be like Jesus and just cure a few?

Terry Hall
Limmy

 

Have you ever fallen down stairs?

Paul Chowdhry
Richard Osman
Arthur Smith

 

Who do you consider the most appalling member of Margaret Thatcher’s cabinet (excluding Margaret Thatcher)?

Robert Webb

 

If everyone else in the world left in a spaceship and left you behind, so everything belonged to you, where would you live? What paintings would you have on your wall? Would you be lonely? Where would be the most ostentatious place you would masturbate?

Sara Pascoe
Robert Webb

 

If you had to live the rest of your life either as Chandler from Friends or as the actor Matthew Perry, which of those would you choose?

Robert Webb

 

What is the shortest time between buying something expensive/nice and breaking it that you have experienced?

Robert Webb

 

Have you ever surprised a dog?

Robert Webb

 

What is the worst place you’ve ever picnicked?

Robert Webb

 

Do you think you’ve cried more tears or created more sexual juices in your lifetime? And would you appreciate some afterlife It’s a Knockout affair to settle the question in heaven?

Ed Byrne

 

What is the worst thing you have eaten for a bet?

Terry Hall
Ellie Taylor

 

Would you rather be an orchestra that has been assimilated by the Borg, and endlessly plays only orchestral versions of Mel and Kim songs, or a cart horse that has to pull a cart full of corpses of all your cart horse friends around all day long but is otherwise treated well and gets Sunday off?

Kathy Burke
Ellie Taylor

 

If you had to have your genitals stapled to the face of a celebrity, and had to walk around for the rest of your life with your genitals stapled to their face, if you had to, which celebrity would you have your genitals stapled to and how do you imagine you would negotiate with them about whose turn it is to do stuff?

Ellie Taylor

 

How do you think having your genitals stapled to their face would impact on their job?

Ellie Taylor

 

Would you rather have a heart made out of diamonds or a spade made out of clubs?

Ellie Taylor

 

What do you most regret destroying with fire?

Sara Barron
Simon Brodkin
Rebecca Callard
Paul Chowdhry
Jena Friedman
Richard Osman
Ellie Taylor

 

Who is your favourite mythological figure?

Ellie Taylor

 

Which is the best of the cartoon cats?

Ellie Taylor

 

If I have food on my face or food stuck in my teeth, would you tell me about it?

Ellie Taylor

 

Would you rather be a bogey or some belly button fluff?

Ellie Taylor

 

What’s the strangest name you’ve ever heard someone give to their parents?

Ellie Taylor

 

What is the most libelous thing you can say about Prince Andrew, remembering it can not be true?

Armando Iannucci

 

Boxer shorts or serendipity?

Rachel Parris

 

What is the strangest thing you’ve found in your cleavage, belly button, or anal cleft?

Rachel Parris

 

When’s International Men’s Day?

Rachel Parris

 

What is your favourite direction on the compass?

Rachel Parris

 

What’s the most unusual thing you ever collected?

Rachel Parris

 

If you could put a custard pie in the face of anyone in the world, with no returns, who would you custard pie?

Rachel Parris

 

What do women want?

Rachel Parris

 

Have you ever had a dream that accurately predicted the future?

John Moloney

 

What is the most expensive thing you have ever lost?

Jan Ravens

 

When you have fears that you may cease to be before your pen has glean’d your teeming brain, what do you do about that?

Jan Ravens

 

If you had to eat a person, if you had to, who would you eat and in what order would you devour their body sections?

Jan Ravens

 

How much is a pint of bull semen?

Jan Ravens

 

What age do you think you have to be to be old?

Ed Miliband & Geoff Lloyd

 

Have you ever been belittled by a scaffolder?

Simon Brodkin

 

Wasn’t Brexit a brilliant idea?

Simon Brodkin

 

Is there a part of you that would actually like to live in a Christmas future where Tiny Tim has died in infancy?

Simon Brodkin

 

How many ghosts are there in The Christmas Carol?

Simon Brodkin

 

Do you think Noel Edmonds has ever spent a Christmas alone?

Simon Brodkin
Caroline Quentin

 

Does it ever concern you the name Minstrels has a potentially racist derivation? I mean, sure there were minstrels during the Middle Ages, but is that what Galaxy names the chocolates after? Are you being slightly racist if you enjoy them?

Simon Brodkin

 

Is it cheating to have sex with a robot Santa Claus?

Richard Osman

 

Do you think Christmas is celebrated on other planets? Which ones?

Richard Osman

 

What became of the gold, frankincense, and myrrh? They’re mentioned there at the beginning of the Bible, then we never hear about them again. To a humble biblical family like the Christs, wouldn’t that have been the equivalent of a roll-over lottery win? How come they still lived in relative poverty?

Richard Osman

 

In the song The Twelve Days of Christmas, do you think that along with the eight maids a milking, the true love received eight cows, or do you think she was expected to provide the cows from her own pocket? Because that severely devalues the gift. If the cows are included, that actually means she got sixteen things that day, thus ruining the song.

Richard Osman

 

Have you ever hidden in a Zedbed?

Richard Osman

 

Have you ever had anything removed from your body?

Richard Osman

 

Who is your favourite Quaker?

Richard Osman

 

Do you think Christmas might have been invented by a mulled wine salesman, desperate to get rid of a warehouse full of little muslin bags full of weird spices?

Reginald D. Hunter

 

What is the funniest fart you have witnessed around the Christmas dinner table?

Reginald D. Hunter

 

If you had to marry a piece of furniture, if you had to, which piece of furniture would you marry?

Sophie Willan
Katy Wix

 

Would you rather be allergic to wood or not?

Katy Wix

 

What’s the worst swap you’ve ever made?

Katy Wix

 

Why do you think everyone stopped wearing hats?

Katy Wix

 

What is the most important thing you’ve ever unplugged to charge your phone?

Sophie Duker
Katy Wix

 

What is the most valuable thing that you have ever buried?

Paul Chowdhry

 

Do you have a celebrity hand twin?

Paul Chowdhry

 

What was the worst occasion in which you were totally naked?

Holly Burn
Paul Chowdhry

 

Would you rather have a clitoris in the crook between your thumb and finger, or have a bionic nose?

All Killa No Filla
Kathy Burke

 

Would you like to taste my special porridge?

Adam Kay

 

How do you decide when it’s time to retire a pair of pants?

Jo Caulfield
Mackenzie Crook
John Robins & Elis James

 

Can you believe you’ve read this far?

Danielle Ward

 

Who do you consider the best of Jesus’s disciples?

Matt Forde
Max & Ivan
Trev & Simon

 

Have you ever fallen victim to a con man?

Trev & Simon

 

When was the last time you travelled by coach?

Mackenzie Crook
Vic Reeves
Shaun Williamson

 

What is the strangest thing you’ve ever found in your junk email?

Mackenzie Crook

 

Do you have a favourite plate?

Mackenzie Crook

 

How cracked/broken does a mug have to be before you throw it away?

Mackenzie Crook

 

What is the most public place you have ever given or received oral sex?

Mackenzie Crook

 

What is the most mundane encounter you have had with a celebrity?

All Killa No Filla
Lucy Beaumont
Daliso Chaponda
Fingers on Buzzers
Phil Wang

 

What did you abhor as a child that you now like?

Maria Bamford
Katherine Ryan

 

What is the strangest place that a cat has licked you?

Kerry Howard
Katherine Ryan

 

Have you ever improvised a condom?

Maria Bamford
Peter Baynham
Pippa Evans
My Dad Wrote a Porno
Katherine Ryan
Sophie Willan

 

Is sex with a Frankenstein cheating?

Jayde Adams
Peter Baynham
Nish Kumar
Al Murray

 

What is the biggest animal whose life you have saved?

Holly Burn
Pippa Evans
Rose Matafeo
Tiff Stevenson

 

What film/story would you like to see remade by the Muppets?

Maria Bamford
Holly Burn
Pippa Evans
My Dad Wrote a Porno
Lou Sanders

 

What’s the most expensive thing you’ve had eaten by a pet?

Isma Almas
Maria Bamford
Russell Howard

 

If every time you farted a fairy died an agonizing death, would you stop farting?

Sophie Willan

 

Why did Itsu in Notting Hill change from a sit-down sushi restaurant, with all the stuff going around on the conveyor belt, to just selling stuff out of fridges?

Sophie Willan

 

Who would win in a fight: King Kong or King Dong?

Sophie Willan

 

Why can’t we live forever?

Sophie Willan

 

What is the worst music that you’ve had on whilst having sex?

Desiree Burch
Holly Burn
Al Murray
My Dad Wrote a Porno

 

What is the most beautiful thing that you have ever destroyed?

Desiree Burch
Sophie Duker
Grace Petrie

 

Would you rather be able to stop time and rewind your life twenty seconds, but only once per day, or touch God’s cock?

Al Murray

 

Do you think it’s possible that we’re all robots that we are all robots and we don’t know we’re robots?

My Dad Wrote a Porno

 

What is the most humiliating thing you’ve ever done for chocolate?

My Dad Wrote a Porno

 

If you had to stick a Borrower up your ass, if you had to, which Borrower would you stick up there?

Rebecca Callard
Jessica Fostekew

 

How is anyone with any intelligence not an alcoholic?

Jonathan Ames

 

What has been your least enjoyable experience of food poisoning?

Jonathan Ames

 

What was the last thing you lamented?

Alex Horne

 

What was the last thing you laminated?

Alex Horne
Lauren Pattison

 

What was the last thing you lamented laminating?

Alex Horne

 

Would you rather have dandruff that doubled up as an acceptable substitute for ground coriander, or smegma that tasted like the most delicious cottage cheese?

Ross Noble

 

What is the worst thing that a cow has done to you?

Konnie Huq
Seymour Mace
Ross Noble
Sukh Ojla

 

What’s the scariest thing that’s ever happened to you in a B&B?

Toby Hadoke
Alice Lowe
Seymour Mace

 

Do you think that Dr. Who ever tried to suck his own cock?

Toby Hadoke

 

If you had to put three Doctors in a human centipede, which three would you put in?

Toby Hadoke

 

We’ve all built a snowman, right? What’s the most unusual thing or being that you’ve ever crafted out of snow?

Sara Barron
Lou Sanders

 

In films, snowmen are always coming to life. If that really happened, would you be happy or just freaked out?

Lou Sanders

 

Have you ever kept a secret and never told a single soul about it?

Lucy Beaumont
Lou Sanders

 

Have you ever employed a smith of any kind?

Jess Robinson
Glenn Wool

 

What do you think is the lamest modern-day item that you could take back to the Middle Ages and then it would lead to you becoming king of the Middle Ages?

Alice Lowe
Joe Lycett
Jess Robinson

 

If you had to wear somebody’s guts for garters, if you had to, who would you disembowel to facilitate your socks staying up?

Alice Lowe

 

You are dressed so well tonight. What was your worst fashion decision you ever made?

Jess Robinson

 

Have you ever travelled on West Midlands Railway? If not, what is your least favourite railway company?

Jess Robinson

 

Have you ever suckled on the dugs of a barren old woman?

Stephen Grant
John Robins
Jess Robinson

 

What is your favourite flat thing?

Jess Robinson

 

Would you rather be furry like a bear or scaly like a fish?

Jess Robinson

 

Have you ever met Prince Andrew?

Sanjeev Bhaskar
Drunk Women Solving Crime

 

Would you rather have a fold-out table that grew out of your rib cage and which could be put up and down in mere seconds, or a stretchy back skin which could be pulled over your head to act as a makeshift bivouac?

Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt
Drunk Women Solving Crime

 

Were you ever in a fan club?

Drunk Women Solving Crime

 

What’s your beauty secret?

Sanjeev Bhaskar
Greg Davies
Joe Lycett

 

What’s the most impressive place that you have revealed you’re naked?

Greg Davies

 

Would you rather be the face of a twin, mostly absorbed in utero, staring out of the stomach of your otherwise regular twin – you would be able to think independently and talk and pass comment on what they were up to and chat with them if they’re lonely or if you’re lonely, or be the prisoner of a randy bigfoot, who so far has treated you kindly enough but has a look in his eye?

Greg Davies
Scummy Mummies
Thom Tuck

 

Would you rather have the living face of your own twin, who you had mostly absorbed in utero staring out of your stomach, who would be able to think independently and talk and pass comment on what you were up to and chat with you when you’re lonely, or live on top of a pole in the desert for thirty years like Simeon Stylites?

Lucy Beaumont
Greg Davies
Thom Tuck

 

What is the best thing you’ve ever bounced on?

Isma Almas
Greg Davies

 

Have you or do you suspect that you’ve ever made love to an insect that has taken human form for the night?

Amanda Abbington
Rose Matafeo

 

What is the largest number of insects that you have been attacked by at one time?

Rose Matafeo

 

If there are ever sex robots, as any right-thinking person hopes, would they be self-cleaning or would there be another small robot that would clean the sex robot or would there be a person whose job was to clean out the sex robot before the next person used it? Can you think of a worse job?

Amanda Abbington
Joe Lycett
Rose Matafeo
Daniel Sloss

 

If you could travel in time and have sex with any historical figure, who would you have sex with?

Rose Matafeo

 

If you had to invent a fifth season, which two other seasons would you put it in between, and what would happen in it?

Jenn Brister
Spencer Jones
Nish Kumar

 

Have you ever been on a plane that’s been in an emergency and seen a genuine look of fear on the face of a flight attendant?

Do the Right Thing
James O’Brien
Rachel Parris
Tape Face

 

Have you ever milked an animal or a human?

Isma Almas
James O’Brien

 

If, like Adam Sandler in The Cobbler, you had the power to transform yourself into any person with the same size feet as you by wearing their shoes after you’d cobbled them on a magic machine, which person with the same size feet as you would you become?

Joel Dommett
Bobby Mair
James O’Brien

 

How many spoons do you think there are in Cairo?

Amanda Abbington

 

What is the most inexplicable thing you have seen in the sky?

Amanda Abbington
Maisie Adam

 

Marmite: Do you love it or hate it? Or do you not mind it? Or have you never tried it, in which case shall we go and buy some and you can try it? Okay, got some now – taste it. Do you love it or hate it or are you ambivalent or somewhere on a sliding scale between those points, if so, quantify that as a percentage, where hate is naught percent and love is one hundred percent?

Amanda Abbington

 

Who or what is your favourite Jacob or Jacobs?

Amanda Abbington

 

What do you think of the decision made by Jeffrey Katzenberg of Disney Studios to cut the song When Love is Gone from the theatrical release of A Muppet Christmas Carol? I mean, it’s a bit soppy, but surely it ruins the balance at the ending, when the song is reprised, as The Love We Found. Doesn’t it? I’m not calling Katzenberg a prick – that’s not my place. Not on this special day.

Amanda Abbington

 

What is the smallest amount of money you have received in a Christmas card from an elderly relative?

Amanda Abbington
Fern Brady

 

Do you have a favourite joke?

Joe Lycett

 

Have you ever caught a falling nun?

Joe Lycett

 

If you could spend Christmas with any celebrity, who would it be and how would you explain to them why you were in their house?

Joe Lycett

 

Knees and elbows seem flawed – I think we can all agree about that. What do you find most annoying about them and how would you improve them?

Joe Lycett

 

How many tennis balls would fit inside a Boeing 737, to the nearest three?

Fingers on Buzzers

 

If I asked you to get a moon rock for me right now, where would you go and how would you get it?

Fingers on Buzzers

 

If you had to have the head of another human being grafted onto your shoulder in order to save space and resources, whose head would you be okay with having placed next to yours? Would it be better or worse if it was your partner’s? How much money would you have to be paid to go along with the arrangement? What if it was your head that was going to be put on someone else’s body? Have a good think about it. It wouldn’t all be bad.

Rick Edwards

 

What is the most surprising thing you’ve ever found in a tumble dryer?

Rick Edwards

 

Which sense could you do without?

Sanjeev Bhaskar

 

If you only had a week to live, who would you tell to go fuck themselves?

James Acaster
Terry Hall
Limmy
Steve McNeil

 

Do you or did you have a celebrity shag list?

Terry Hall
John Robins

 

What did you buy with your first week’s wages?

Terry Hall

 

What do you think would be the worst flavour for a flavoured condom?

Terry Hall

 

Have you ever slept overnight to be first in a queue?

Terry Hall

 

What food have you consumed the longest after its expiration date and what were the consequences of that, if any?

Adam Buxton

 

If you were stranded on a desert island and were allowed to have eight disc-shaped items with you, but you could not have two of any individual item, which eight discs would you have with you?

Adam Buxton

 

What was the weirdest reason you ever skived off school?

James Acaster
Emily Atack
Rob Brydon
Janice Connolly
Kerry Howard
Suzi Ruffell
Sathnam Sanghera

 

What is the unhappiest animal you’ve ever seen in a zoo?

Kerry Howard
Sathnam Sanghera

 

Who is your favourite hometown celebrity?

Kiri Pritchard-McLean
Sathnam Sanghera

 

What is the best thing you’ve ever lost and then found again?

Emily Atack
Suzi Ruffell

 

For your money, which STD would win in a world cup of sexually-transmitted diseases?

Emily Atack
London Hughes

 

What is your favourite oxide?

Peter Lord

 

What was the worst thing a teacher ever said or did to you at school? And was it a games teacher?

James Acaster
Joel Dommett
Ed Gamble
Kerry Howard
Peter Lord
Suzi Ruffell

 

Is there anything you’d like to have made for you specially by porn stars?

James Acaster
Joel Dommett
Ed Gamble
Russell Howard

 

What is your favourite keyboard shortcut?

Joel Dommett

 

Do you wash your legs when you’re having a shower?

Joel Dommett

 

What is your favourite kind of non-human milk to drink?

Matt Forde
Olga Koch

 

Why do they call the place you put your fresh bread a bread bin, and what do they call the place where you dispose of your non-fresh bread?

Rosie Jones

 

If you had to bum – either with your genitals or a dildo – one of the main characters in the TV show Red Dwarf, who would you bum and would you use your genitals or a dildo? And remember it’s the character, not the actor.

Do the Right Thing

 

Do you think you would have made a good sheriff in the Wild West?

Daliso Chaponda
Do the Right Thing
Robert Webb

 

Have you ever sat on a tuffet? What do you think a tuffet is?

No Such Thing As A Fish

 

What is more important to you: brains or beauty?

No Such Thing As A Fish

 

If you could have a sexual superpower, what would it be?

Lucy Beaumont
No Such Thing As A Fish
Vikki Stone

 

Phoebe Herring: What do you think rainbows smell of?

Fiona Allen

 

What is the most disgusting household chore that you secretly quite enjoy doing?

Fiona Allen

 

I like your hair, but what was your most disastrous haircut? Warning: Don’t say the first bit to a bald person, or probably the second bit.

Fiona Allen
Vikki Stone

 

Isn’t it best just to get the sex out of the way as soon as possible in a relationship to discover if there’s anything more than physical attraction going on?

Fiona Allen

 

You should never put an ice lolly in your vagina. But if you had to, which ice lolly would you put in your vagina?

Rebecca Callard
Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney
Laura Lexx
Tony Law

 

Can men be funny?

Isma Almas
Laura Lexx

 

Can money buy you happiness?

Laura Lexx

 

Have you ever bought a biscuit or chocolate bar that has turned up with an ingredient missing from it? And was it better or worse?

Laura Lexx
Scummy Mummies
Phil Wang

 

What faulty machine once gave you an unexpected cash or free item windfall?

Laura Lexx
Scummy Mummies
Phil Wang

 

What is the most alarming thing that has entered or exited your body?

Tony Law

 

Have you ever seen a UFO?

Lucy Beaumont
Ed Gamble

 

If the sun wasn’t going to come up tomorrow unless you threw a member of your family into a volcano, which member of your family would you throw into the volcano, or would you not throw anyone in and doom your hemisphere to icy death?

Lucy Beaumont

 

Who was the biggest prick at your school?

Phil Wang

 

What is the most slapstick thing that has even happened to you in real life?

Vikki Stone

 

What is the most selfish thing you’ve ever prayed for and what do you think God made of your self-centered request?

Vikki Stone

 

What’s the most unusual thing you’ve ever rented?

Jayde Adams

 

Have you ever stolen a golf buggy?

Snjólaug Lúðvíksdóttir

 

What is the most stupid thing you’ve done for love?

Snjólaug Lúðvíksdóttir

 

Would you rather have a neck like a giraffe or a tongue like a lizard?

Snjólaug Lúðvíksdóttir

 

How often do you replace your pillows?

Snjólaug Lúðvíksdóttir

 

Have you ever had a crumpled ball?

John Robins

 

Did you know that Jools Holland’s Hootenanny is pre-recorded?

John Robins

 

Is your happiest memory of a time when you were alone or with other people?

Spencer Jones

 

If you could take one item from any museum or art gallery – and you’re allowed to take it home with you – in the world, what would you take?

James Acaster
Maisie Adam
Rob Auton
Aisling Bea
Cally Beaton
Bethany Black
Fern Brady
Jenn Brister
Nathan Caton
Jo Caulfield
Daliso Chaponda
Frank Cottrell-Boyce
Sophie Duker
Jenny Eclair
George Egg
Simon Evans
Flo & Joan
Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney
Alice Fraser
Nick Frost
Annabel Giles
Bettany Hughes
Robin Ince
Greg Jenner
Spencer Jones
John Kearns
Bryony Kimming
Olga Koch
Limmy
Seymour Mace
Max & Ivan
Ian McMillan
Steve McNeil
Tim Minchin
Susan Murray
Sukh Ojla
Richard Osman
Rachel Parris
Sunil Patel
Lauren Pattison
Grayson Perry
Grace Petrie
Kiri Pritchard-McLean
David Reed
Kate Robbins
Ahir Shah
Paul Sinha
Michael Spicer
Tape Face
Thom Tuck
Sindhu Vee
Seann Walsh
Mark Watson
Robert Webb
Rich Wilson
Mike Wozniak

 

What was the biggest lie your parents ever told you?

Janey Godley & Ashley Storrie

 

Obviously you must never put chocolate in your vagina; you know that. But if you had to put a chocolate bar in your vagina, which chocolate bar would you put in your vagina?

Lauren Pattison

 

What is the largest animal that you think you could take down in a fight?

Richard Osman

 

Have you ever taken a lie detector test?

Richard Osman

 

What’s the least impressive thing you can spend a lot of money on?

Rob Auton
Sunil Patel
Rich Wilson

 

When was the last time you saw a donkey?

Michael Ian Black
Daliso Chaponda

 

What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you at a funeral?

Daliso Chaponda

 

What is your favourite pinball table?

Sukh Ojla

 

Do you ever secretly wonder if you are the new Jesus?

Susan Murray

 

Do you ever wonder if secretly you’re a prince or princess and that you’ll one day take your rightful place on the throne?

Susan Murray

 

What is the biggest animal that has bitten you?

Alice Fraser
Susan Murray

 

What is the biggest animal you have bitten?

Alice Fraser
Susan Murray

 

Are human beings ultimately selfish creatures?

George Egg

 

Which is the best caves: Cheddar Caves or Wookie Hole?

Cally Beaton

 

Isn’t silver actually better than gold?

Angela Barnes

 

Have you ever planted a tree or chopped one down? If you’ve done both, which was the more satisfying?

Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt

 

Why do we even bother?

Mark Charnock & Dominic Brunt

 

What is the tamest image or thought that you have used for masturbatory purposes?

Sarah Millican

 

What is your favourite cruciferous vegetables?

Lucy Beaumont
Steve McNeil
Sarah Millican

 

If an older version of you came back from the future and gave you advice about what you should do with your life, would you take the advice or assume that the you from the future was evil and trying to screw you over?

Russell Howard

 

What is the most unlikely thing you’ve mistaken for a toilet?

Russell Howard

 

Would you rather have a hand made out of ham or equality?

Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney

 

What is the worst example or mansplaining that you have encountered or seen?

Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney

 

Would you rather have the ability to shoot bees out of your eyes or have a pair of shoes that never needed to be cleaned or repaired?

Deborah Frances-White & Siobhan McSweeney

 

Do you think it would be cheating if I had sex with you when you were being the robot in Passengers?

Michael Sheen

 

What’s your greatest weakness?

Ed Gamble
Michael Sheen

 

King Herod never killed any children. Discuss.

Ed Gamble

 

Have you ever tried tilting at windmills?

Ed Gamble

 

Have you got what it takes to be a steeplejack?

Ed Gamble

 

What was the worst thing that a relative bought you something for Christmas that wasn’t quite what you wanted but you had to pretend to like it anyway?

Caroline Quentin

 

What kind of animal do you think the Teletubbies are?

Caroline Quentin

 

If you had to put everyone called Smith in a league table based on their worth, who would be A) the best Smith, B) the median Smith, and C) the worst Smith. Only answer when you can give a name for all three Smiths.

Caroline Quentin

 

Do you think that Barry from EastEnders ever tried to suck his own cock?

Shaun Williamson

 

Have you ever tried to suck each other’s cocks?

Max & Ivan

 

Who’s the most surprising famous person you’ve been in a lift with? And which I mean, you can’t have gotten into the lift with them; they had to be in the lift you were in.

James Acaster
Maisie Adam
Aisling Bea
Lucy Beaumont
Bethany Black
Michael Ian Black
Nathan Caton
Frank Cottrell-Boyce
Robin Ince
Greg Jenner
Dave Johns
Athena Kugblenu
Seymour Mace
Max & Ivan
Rachel Parris
Sara Pascoe
David Reed
Kate Robbins
Paul Sinha
Michael Spicer

 

Would you rather have no ears or no dignity?

Max & Ivan

 

Do you think anyone genuinely enjoys skiing?

Grayson Perry

 

What do you consider the biggest waste of time from your life thus far?

Annabel Giles

 

What’s your favourite type of dinosaur? Would you like one as a pet? What would be the potential drawbacks?

Simon Evans
Mark Watson

 

Do you think that the voice in your head that you perceive as yourself is the one making the actual decisions, or is there a shadowy other you for whom the you voice is just a toadying spokesperson who never speaks but makes all the actual choices that the you voice then has to justify to you?

Simon Evans

 

What is the largest vehicle you’ve driven?

Seann Walsh

 

If your genitals had to be replaced by the face of one of the Muppets – the face would be able to interact and communicate in exactly the same way as the puppet – which puppet face would replace your genitals?

Janice Connolly
Graham Fellows
Olga Koch

 

Which kid at your school had the worst schoolbag?

Lucy Beaumont

 

Which celebrity do you think is the most likely to have a collection of the severed fingers of his or her victims made into a bizarre necklace that he or she wears when they’re away from the spotlight?

Lucy Beaumont

 

What if part of the Frankenstein is taken from your partner?

Jayde Adams

 

Is it cheating to have sex with someone who has had an organ donated to them by your partner, or is it your duty?

Jayde Adams

 

Overall, wouldn’t you rather your family just totaled up how much Christmas costs and then divided that sum of money equally between you all?

Tape Face

 

Who is the best Benny?

Tape Face

 

What do you think the fourth law of robotics should be?

Ahir Shah

 

Do you think God has ever tried to suck his own cock?

Francesca Stavrakopoulou

 

If I said you had a beautiful body, would you tell me I should ask for a refund from the author of this book?

Mike Wozniak

 

Who is the most evil person you have ever met?

Mike Wozniak

 

What is the worst thing that has happened to you on holiday?

Mike Wozniak

 

Which non-potato crisp is the best?

Athena Kugblenu

 

Who is the most famous person you’ve asked to dance?

Aisling Bea
David Reed
Paul Sinha

 

Have you ever been put into a poisonous coma by hornets?

Paul Sinha

 

If you and your four best friends were in the Spice Girls, what would be your Spice names? This is a trick question. The names are easy; the real question is to work out who your four best friends are.

Paul Sinha

 

Of the four friends you chose to be in your Spice Girls band, and who you’ve given funny names, how many do you think would have chosen you to be in their Spice Girls band?

Paul Sinha

 

Have you ever been refused entry to a country?

Tim Minchin

 

Have you ever been in a motorboat?

Tim Minchin

 

Richard accidentally elbowed Denise van Outen in the face on Channel 5’s Celebrity Game Night. What is the worst injury you have directly or indirectly caused to a celebrity or person of renown?

Janice Connolly

 

Do you think they should introduce VAR (Video Assistant Referee)? Would you like that in every day life? What instance or arguments would want you replayed and resolved from recently?

Janice Connolly

 

Richard has been meaning to clean the drain outside his kitchen ever since he moved into his new house two years ago. What is the longest-running chore that you have been intending to do but keep putting off?

Janice Connolly

 

Do you have romantic regrets?

Rachel Parris

 

Have you ever seen a fairy?

Rachel Parris

 

What’s your most common recurring dream?

Rachel Parris

 

Is it better to have loved and lost than to have to eat nothing but Pop-Tarts for a year?

Olga Koch

 

Would you rather suck off a troll or be bummed by a leprechaun?

Olga Koch
Steve McNeil

 

Do you have an envelope cupboard?

Olga Koch

 

Have you ever colluded with a Russian?

Olga Koch

 

Have you ever canoodled with a Russian?

Olga Koch

 

Have you ever canoed with a Russian?

Olga Koch

 

What have you done to help the aged?

Konnie Huq

 

What do you think the tooth fairy is doing with all those teeth?

Steve McNeil

 

Have you ever grown cress?

Steve McNeil

 

Which is superior cress – land or water?

Steve McNeil

 

Have you ever been in the proximity of one of your heroes and been too shy to say anything to them?

Steve McNeil

 

Do you think that you’d make a good pope?

Limmy

 

Is there an author who you would have liked to have heard read their own books on an audiobook from the past, before this technology existed?

James Acaster
Aisling Bea
Adam Buxton
Bettany Hughes
Greg Jenner
Richard Osman
Michael Palin
Robert Webb

 

Over the last few months, I’ve watched every episode of How I Met Your Mother. What is the most degrading thing you’ve done to yourself for no apparent reason?

James Acaster
Aisling Bea
Michael Spicer
Mark Watson
Robert Webb

 

If you were in hospital, would you prefer to die than meet Patch Adams?

Michael Spicer

 

What do you think is the enduring appeal of dressing up as the 118 running men from those old 118 adverts? That still happens. If you go to a marathon people still dress as those guys, even now. It’s an easy costume, I guess, but is it as funny as anyone who does it thinks it is?

Michael Spicer

 

I kind of fantasize about a world where everyone else is gone off in a spaceship; they’ve left me behind on purpose because they don’t like me. I don’t mind that. And the whole of the world is yours, which building would you live in if you had the access? If everyone else had gone and you were living alone, is there a building you would like to live in?

Mark Watson

 

What’s the worst thing that has become entangled in your hair?

Mark Watson

 

Phoebe Herring: Would you rather fall into a pool of lava or, at the last minute, be eaten by a crocodile instead of falling into the pool of lava?

Kiri Pritchard-McLean
Robert Webb

 

How obsessive are you about your bins?

Robert Webb

 

Is it cheating on your partner to have sex with something that is fifty percent mouse? Half of it is a rodent, half of it is a human being.

Greg Jenner

 

If you could travel back to medieval times, what single object would you take with you that would guarantee that you would be made queen/worshiped as a god?

Lauren Pattison

 

Is honesty the best policy? If not, what is the best policy?

Lauren Pattison

 

Would you consider to be cheating to sleep with a gender-reverse version of yourself?

Maisie Adam

 

What is the worst thing that’s ever happened to you when you’ve been kissing?

Maisie Adam

 

I’ve got eight bowls. Should I put the chipped ones at the bottom at the back? There are two rows of four, basically. Or should I – What would you do? Would you put the chipped ones at the back and only use them when you had to or would you put them at the front and use them more because if they get chipped again it won’t matter if they get broken it won’t matter as much? What would you do?

Jo Caulfield

 

In the lockdown I realized I’ve only put on proper trousers, well, now twice. But the first time I put on, like, and when I say proper trousers I mean jeans. I’ve been wearing swimming trunks, jogging bottoms, cycling shorts – I’m wearing today. Anything but, like, proper trousers. Have you been dressing yourself properly during lockdown? Or have you been like me, and I only put on proper trousers last weekend because we had guests come around, and I didn’t know them quite well enough to be just wearing my grey jogging bottoms?

Jo Caulfield

 

Who is the greatest living American?

Bilal Zafar

 

Has anyone ever given you advice on how to control an animal of any kind?

Sophie Duker

 

What’s the strangest or nicest thing a fan has brought to you?

Sophie Duker

 

How do you eat a soft-boiled egg?

Sophie Duker
Sindhu Vee